The Left Shoe Show
by Lysaka
Summary: Prankster, Marbles and Ramble are talk show hosts yaye! They kidnap the newsies and force them to confess their deepest darkest secrets, hilarity ensues
1. Medda's How Old?

****

Hey there, it's Lysaka, also known to some as Prankster. I'm back from Mexico and I brought a new fic back with me. 

Disclaimer: I don't own Newsies, The Price is Right, Kenmore, A Few Good Men, The FBI, a studio to really film this, Quipster or Gears. (They belong to themselves I suppose) I do however own, Prankster, Marbles and Ramble.

Warnings: This story is supposed to make no sense. It's just a random excuse to have fun. The themes expressed in this story may be controversial and could be considered offensive to others. Squeamish individuals or those uncomfortable with progressive thought are advised to keep their distance. In short, If you have no sense of humor, STAY AWAY!

Now with that said, enjoy

Episode one: The Left Shoe Show is born, and Medda's how old?

***************************************************** *********

(Looks like a typical talk show studio, Prankster sits behind the big desk, two girls sit in chairs by the desk)

Prankster: Hi there, and welcome to my show. I'm your host Prankster and these (points to girls in chairs who wave) are my co-hosts, Ramble and Marbles.

Marbles: What's the name of our show?

Prankster: uuummmmmm….

Marbles: (angry) You haven't thought of a name? 

Prankster: I haven't thought that far ahead.

Ramble: (excited) I KNOW! Name it 'The Left Shoe Show'

P&M: O.o……….

Prankster: Ok that works. Welcome to 'The Left Shoe show'

Ramble: Now we need a theme song.

Marbles: No we don't

Ramble: Yes we do

Marbles: (getting angry at her twin) No we don't!

Ramble: YES WE DO!

Prankster: (joking) Why not use the 'Psycho' theme?

Ramble: No, I already have one.

Prankster: (Amused) ok, what's your song.

Ramble: THE WATERMELON SONG!

P&M: O.o……

Ramble: (singing) I ate a watermelon, 

And all the seeds fell out

And when I went to pick them up.

They all began to shout.

(At the top of her lungs) YOU ATE MY MOMMA! (Ramble collapses into a fit of giggles.

Marbles: What does that have to do with the show?

Ramble: Absolutely nothing! (Continues laughing)

Prankster: (bangs head on her desk) Ladies and Gentlemen, my sister.

Ramble: tee-hee

Prankster: (back on the subject) Ok people, this is how the show works, we kidnap random newsies and force them to reveal their most deepest, darkest secrets. MUHAHAHAHA!

Ramble: For our first example, we have managed to kidnap Medda.

Medda: (sitting in one of the chairs) Hi there.

Prankster: ok these questions came from Gears, 1; You aren't really Swedish are you?

Medda: (hangs head in shame) no, I'm from Indiana. (Sniff) who wants to hear a girl from Indiana sing.

Ramble: Ha! I knew that accent was fake.

Marbles: Yeah and so did the other 95% of the population, congratulations

Ramble: Hey!

Prankster: Next question: (reads card) Again this is from Gears, Is Toby your lover?

Medda: NO! (Said a little to quickly) Ok, there was this one time when we got really drunk, but that was years ago.

Prankster, Ramble, and Marbles: O.O…..

Ramble: Alrighty then, (takes cards) I'll read the next one, hey it's from Gears too, 'Do you find clowns horribly irresistible?'

Medda: What? No, that's Toby's real face.

Prankster: Really? (Mumbles) no wonder Medda didn't get drunk around him again.

Medda: What was that?

Prankster: Nothing, (grabs cards back) Ok, this question comes from Quipster, (reads card) Medda, are you a Pedophile?

Medda: A what?

Marbles: (embarrassed) a Pedophile.

Ramble: (confused) what's a Pedophile?

Medda: I'd like to know too.

Marbles: Well, you see…it's….when you…uummm

Prankster: (fed up) Oh for Pete sakes. (Gets out huge dictionary, to herself) Pedophile. 

P-E-D-O, here it is, pedophile. (Hands dictionary to Ramble)

Ramble: (reads it, and becomes red) oh. (Stands up) I need some water right about now, will you excuse me. (Runs out)

Medda: Well, I'm not sure how to answer the question.

Prankster: (showing no shame) Have you, or ever wanted to have sex with one of the newsies?

Medda: (disgusted) NEVER!

Marbles: ok that settles it, next question, (reads card) How old are you?

Medda: 25

Prankster and Marbles: O.o

Prankster: Wanna try that again?

Medda: Alright 26.

Marbles: (shakes head and calls back stage) RAMBLE! Get out the lie detector!

Ramble: (comes out a la Bob Barker girl style with a lie detector)

Announcer guy: (announces and 'Price is Right' music plays) This lie detector from the FBI, is made out of a durable, non-dent steel and buzz's when someone lies, and it can be yours if the price is right.

Ramble: (giggles)

Prankster, Marbles and Medda: O.o……

Prankster: (to Medda) excuse me one moment, (to Ramble) Ramble? When you went to get that drink of water, you didn't' go to studio 'F' by any chance did you?

Ramble: (weakly) Maybe…..

Marbles: Did you steal the announcer guy from 'The Price is Right?

Ramble: They weren't using him at the moment.

Announce guy: Can I go now? Commercial breaks almost over and I gotta announce products from Kenmore today.

Prankster: Yeah sure go ahead. (Announcer leaves)

Marbles: (looks at Ramble)

Ramble: What?

Marbles: Just stick the lie detector on Medda will ya?

Ramble: (smiles) OK! (Starts hooking up the wires on Medda)

Medda: What is this?

Prankster: It's a lie detector, if you lie it will buzz

Medda: How does it know if I lie?

Marbles: Magic, (to Ramble) ya ready?

Ramble: (nods) yep

Prankster: Ok, again we ask, how old are ya?

Medda: 26 (detector buzzes) fine 35 (buzz) 45 (buzz) 

Prankster: Will ya just tell the truth?

Medda: YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!

Marbles: (to Ramble) Quick 5 points, what movie?

Ramble: (quickly) A Few Good Men

Marbles: Very good. 

Medda: fine, 55. (Buzz)

Prankster: Medda, the faster you answer this question, the faster we let you go!

Medda: OK I'm 58! 

(The girls look at the lie detector expecting it to go off, two are disappointed when it doesn't, one is very happy)

Marbles: YES! (Smiles and puts her hand out) I believe I won the poll. 

(Prankster and Ramble give Marbles the money)

Medda: Does this mean I can go now?

Prankster: (to Marbles) do we have anymore questions?

Marbles: (looks at clipboard) nope.

Prankster: Let her go Ramble.

Ramble: (Unhooks the lie detector and Medda stands up) It was fun having you bye (waves)

(Medda storms out, never to be seen again by the girls) 

(Theme music plays)

Prankster: I guess this means that the episode is over.

Marbles: Guess so

Ramble: Can I sing now?

Prankster: one moment, Come back for the next episode, Jake will be coming over, BYE. (Ramble looks hopeful) Now you can sing.

Ramble: (sings) I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out. And when I went to pick them up they all began to shout. (Shouts) YOU ATE MY MOMMA!

Marbles: (shakes her head) we need a better theme song.

(Fade to black)

************* *******************************

And there's the first episode. Hey got any burning questions you need me, or want me to ask the newsies? Well, just review and I'll make sure they get asked. Hope ya enjoy the fic so far. BYE


	2. Jake's a What!

The Left Shoe Show

Hi there, sorry this took so long to get out. I've been sick lately. ::: coughs a pity cough:::: So send reviews, it's the only way I'll get better. :::smiles:::

Thank you to all of you who reviewed, you guys are awesome.

Disclaimer: I don't own newsies. Ok! I own Prankster, Marbles and Ramble though. So ha! 

Episode 2, Jake's a what?

********************************* ************************

(Prankster, Marbles and Ramble are sitting at the desk.)

Ramble: (singing) I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out. And when I went to pick them up 

they all began to shout. (Shouts) YOU ATE MY MOMMA! 

Prankster: (clutching ear) Ow!

Marbles: Ramble, I like my hearing thank you very much.

Ramble: oops! Sorry.

Prankster: Well, I'm please to announce that we have an audience. 

(One random audience member coughs, silence is heard)

Marbles:…..Yeah. How 'bout that? Anyway, we've kidnapped Jake today. 

(Jake is sitting in the chair, he smiles)

Prankster: Hi there Jake, how ya doing?

(He shrugs)

Ramble: (in all her perkiness) Don't be shy, say something. 

Marbles: Yeah, you don't talk in the movie, but you can talk now.

(Jake points to pen and paper on Prankster's desk)

Prankster: You want this? (Holds pen and paper)

(Jake nods, Prankster gives it to him.)

Jake: (writing) MUTE (gives paper to Prankster)

Prankster: You're a mute?

(Jake nods)

Prankster: Wow, that deep dark secret didn't take us long to uncover. 

Ramble: Well this explains why he never talks.

Marbles: Doesn't explain how the HELL he sells papers!

Prankster: (bangs head on desk, looks up) I need to go. (Looks at Marbles and Ramble) Can I trust you two for 10 minutes if I leave you alone?

Marbles: (hopeful) Could I duct tape Ramble's mouth shut?

Prankster: (thinks) Yeah, that's ok.

Ramble: HEY!

Prankster: ok I'll be right back. (Runs out of the studio) 

************** ************************************************

8 minutes and 23 and a half seconds later Prankster returns

************* *************************************************

Prankster: ok I'm back. (Holds up shopping bag)

Marbles: You left the show to go shopping? 

(Ramble, who is duct tape, gives an angry glare)

Prankster: (opens bag) you can let Ramble go Marbles.

(Marbles doesn't move)

Prankster: let me rephrase that, Marbles, let Ramble go NOW!

Marbles: (gets up) fine, fine, fine, I'm going. (Rips duct tape off Ramble's mouth)

Ramble: Ow! Pain!

Prankster: (shakes her head and walks over to Jake) ok, this is a white board, this is the pen, 

(holds up pen) and this is the eraser, (holds up eraser, hands objects to Jake, and Prankster sits back down.)

Marbles: Can we start the interview now?

Prankster: Yes we can.

Ramble: (holds up paper with questions on it) ok this one's from Aki. "Why do you have such luscious calves?" 

Jake: (writes, then holds up board) I draw a crowd by doing flips, gives my calves a work out.

Marbles: So is that how you sell papes too?

Jake: (writes and holds up board) yes.

Ramble: Interesting, this question is by Aki too, "Why do you hang around Snitch and Itey all the time?"

Jake: O.o….(shrugs and writes anyway) because they're my friends 

Marbles: Ok that works.

Prankster: (snatches questions out of Ramble's hands) oh no, only one more question, this one is from Kathryn, "Why don't you have a newsie name?"

Jake: (writes) Jake is my newsie name!

Ramble: Then what's your real name.

Jake: (writes) I'd tell ya, but then I'd have to kill ya.

Ramble: Why, are you in trouble with the law or something?

Jake: (shakes head)…can I go now?

Marbles: Of course you can't!

Jake: (bolts and runs out the door.)

Ramble: Well, that's it, we tie up our newsies for now.

Marbles: (to Prankster) Who do we have next?

Prankster: (looks at paper and grins) We question Spot! Muhahahaha.

Marbles: God help the boy. 

Ramble: We I guess we should go now. 

Prankster: Ok bye guys.

Ramble: (excited) Can I sing?

Prankster and Marbles: No!

******************************************* *************************

I know, short chapter, sorry. I am just recovering from being sick. Anyway, send your questions for Spot over to me, this interview is going to be interesting.


	3. No, Don't Get Up Spot

****

Hello everyone. I'm back, and I wrote this all in one sitting. I am good. Well, I hope it is. Thank you everyone who sent questions and reviewed. (You guys rock)

Disclaimer: I don't own Newsies, I will NEVER own newsies, I'm making not a dime on this story. Prankster, Marbles and Ramble, however, DO belong to me. Ha!

Now with that said, let's see episode 3. 

Episode 3: No, Don't get up Spot.

************************************* *****************

(Prankster, Ramble and Marbles are sitting at the desk, Spot, looking most unhappy is tied to a chair, and he is struggling with the knots)

Ramble: (not looking up from her coloring book) Don't bother Spot, we used the Boy Scout manual for tying knots, you'll never get out. (To her sisters) Have you seen the 'tickle-me pink?' 

Marbles: (hands Ramble a color) Here you go…umm Ramble, don't you want to sing?

Ramble: OH YEAH! (Sings) I ate a watermelon, and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick them up they all began to shout. (Shouts) YOU ATE MY MOMMA! (Giggles)

Spot: I've been captured by crazies. 

Prankster: No, Ramble's mildly insane, but perfectly harmless. Anyway, we (motions to her sisters and herself) are going to interview you, and we should start now, because so many people have questions for you.

Spot: (smirks after that little ego boosting) Yeah, of coise, I'se da best.

Marbles: O.o…yeah….ok. First question comes from Stress, and Quipster. They want to know, "How did you become the leader of the Brooklyn newsies, since you're so little?"

Spot: (angry) Who they callin' little?

Ramble: (innocent like) hehehe, they're calling you little, didn't you hear the question. (Gasp) Prankster, maybe he's deaf.

Spot: GRR… I ain't deaf!!!!!!!!

Marbles: Answer the question Spot

Spot: What if I don' wanna?

(Prankster holds up taser and turns it on) 

Spot: Ok, I became da Brooklyn leader afta da odda one left, and because I'se da best fighta, I'se da leada now.

Prankster: (looks at paper) Well, Gears says it's because you don't believe in the curse.

Spot: O.o…da curse?

Prankster: Yeah, the curse that says every Brooklyn newsie leader will go insane from pressure and turn into a cross dresser and work for Medda by age 18. 

Spot: uuummmmm…..dat's news ta me.

Ramble: (looks at paper) Hey look another question from Gears, "Rumor has it, you and Jack Kelly are more than just good friends, what's up?"

Spot: O.O! (Disbelief) Was dat goil askin' if Me and Jacky-boy….?

(All three girls nod their heads)

Spot: (totally pissed) NEVAH! Where's dis Gears, I'll kill 'er!

Ramble: Spot calm down, or I'll shove forest green down your throat. (Holds up crayon) 

(Spot shuts up.)

Prankster: Ok another question from Gears, "why do you have a cane?"

Marbles: hehehe, as Smartass would say, "It's because you can't have two long things."

Spot: (struggles to get free so he can kill Marbles) Why you….gggrrrr

Prankster: Answer the question and you'll get out of here faster!

Spot: (shouting) DA CANE WAS ME FADDA'S WANNA TEASE ME NOW!

(Crickets chirp, a lone member of the audience coughs, the next 5 seconds are very awkward)

Ramble: (coloring) Tee-Hee, hey look, ANOTHER question from Gears, my goodness, it says, "Are you aware of how many girls on the list (and on the world in general) would like to do you from here until next Tuesday?"

Spot: O.O….really? Can you write down their names, I'll be sure to get to them. (Grins)

Prankster: (mutters) horn dog.

Spot: What was dat?

Prankster: (smiles, a little too big) Nothing at all. (Looks at paper with questions) Oh, new person. (No offence Gears!) Twig wants to know, "How come we never see you fight….? Or dance…Or move much at all in the movie?" 

Spot: (taking this question suprisingly calm) Whad'da mean? I fight and I move durin' da strike.

Ramble: (confused) Wait, you forgot dancing?

Spot: Well, dat's true, dis white boy can't dance.

Prankster: (struggles not to laugh) ok this one is from Twig also, "Why do you want to bathe in boiling water?"

Spot: (defensive) HEY! I nevah said I wanted ta bathe in it.

Marbles: Yes you….(thinks) wait a minute, No he never did say he would bathe in it.

Ramble: Then why do you want a tub with boiling water?

Spot: (shrugs) 'cause no one's got boilin' water in their tubs.

Prankster: Ok that works. Now this question comes from Bookie. "Have you ever killed anyone with your slingshot?"

Spot: O.o aaahh, no! I don't go 'round killin' people. But, I've taken down some stupid boids.

Ramble: Spot! That's horrible. 

Spot: (rolls his eyes) Oh toughen up, how old are ya? 12?

Ramble: I'm 15

Spot: Ya act like you'se a kid or somethin'. Colorin'?

Ramble: (quivers lip) sniff

Prankster: (turns on taser) Are you dissing coloring? 'Cause unless you wanna leave here in extreme pain, I'd leave coloring out of this.

Ramble: Yeah. (Returns to her box of crayons) meanie.

Prankster: Ok last question we got is from Bookie also, "Have you ever actually slept with anyone."

Spot: Why of coise I have.

(Prankster gives a look that could melt a pinto into twisted metal.)

Spot: (nervous about Prankster) ok I'se nevah slept with anyone.

Marbles: Why not?

Spot: (defensive) Why should I tell you?

Prankster: Because I said so. (Flashes him another pinto melting look) 

Spot. (Mumbles something)

Ramble: What? I couldn't hear you.

Spot: (barely any louder, mumbles again)

Marbles: 'cuse me?

Spot: (shouts) I'SE IMPOTENT OK?

Prankster: Whoa dude! I thought it'd be because you're waiting for love or marriage, or something but….whoa!

Spot: (tries to get out of his ropes again) ok ya learned me deep, dark secret now let me out.

Ramble: Wait, that's why he was being mean about me coloring, he's not getting any.

Spot: (nearly foaming at the mouth) LET ME GO.

Prankster: (red from laughter.) HELL NO! You're staying, for at least a few more episodes. 

Spot: WHY YOU LITTLE BITC- (Marbles puts duct tape on his mouth) 

Ramble: Is the show over?

Marbles: Yeah I think it is.

Prankster: Stay tuned for next episode, we're going to have Kid Blink over, so send any questions for him our way.

Ramble: (sings) I ate a watermelon.

Marbles: NO! No watermelon song. Pick another one.

Ramble: (sings) everybody's doing a brand new dance now (backup, come on baby do the locomotion) I know you'll get to like it if you give it a chance now. (Backup, come on baby do the locomotion) My little baby sister can do it with ease; it's easier then learning your ABC's. So come on, come on, do the locomotion with me.

Marbles and Spot: O.o…….

Prankster: (bangs head on the desk) Marbles get the duct tape.

Ramble: (stops singing) I'll be quiet! (Shuts up)

Prankster: See you all next episode.

*********************************** ******************

:::dodges angry Spot fans throwing stuff:::: ack! Well, there's the chapter, please review, I like those. Don't forget to send any questions you have, or just leave 'em in a review. Anyway, gotta go, have a nice day. Bye.


	4. Where Would Blink Get Those?

Hey guys, I'm sorry for no updates in a long time. My life has been stressful ever since school started again. I'll talk to you guys later bye.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Except for Prankster, Marbles, and Ramble. They do belong to me. Muhahaha. 

Episode 4: Where would Blink get those?

********************************* ************

(Ramble bursts into the room)

Ramble: (shouts) I ATE A WATERMELON AND ALL THE SEEDS FELL OUT. AND WHEN I WENT TO PICK THEM UP THEY ALL BEGAN TO SHOUT YOU ATE MY MOMMA!!!!!

Prankster & Marbles: O.o…….ummmmm

Prankster: Thank you Ramble, sorry for no update in a while. You see this newsie (points to Blink) took us a while to catch.

Marbles: We were also having fun torturing Spot. (Points to Spot. He is tied up with rope and duct tape is covering his mouth, his eyes scream murder and he would be shouting obscenities if not for the duct tape)

Ramble: So yes, we have Blink with us today, hi Blink. (Ramble waves)

Blink: (flashes his infamous smile many girls drool over.)

Ramble: (shocked) PRANKSTER! What if Blink's a mute too?

Marbles: (slaps her forehead) Ramble, he can't be mute! He talks in the movie.

Ramble: Oh yeah.

Prankster: (ignoring her sisters) So Blink, How are ya today?

Blink: I'm doing ok, not everyday you're kidnapped by three beautiful goils.

Ramble: (smiles)

Marbles: You're taking this much better than Spot.

Ramble: (pouts) Yeah, Spot can be mean when he's confessing secrets, he made fun of coloring.

Prankster: I know that was a horrible experience but we need to interview Blink. First question comes from Tunes; she wants to know why do you and Mush slap each other all the time?

Blink: (chuckles) hehehe, well, we've been doing that for a long time.

Ramble: Why?

Blink: Well, whenever Mush would see a pretty goil, I'd slap 'im to get 'im back to reality. One day he started hittin' back.

Marbles: ok, next question is from Tunes also, Why do you lick your lips so much?

Blink: Because they get dry.

Ramble: ok, I wanna know this one, (holds up crayons) should I color my sky with traditional sky blue, or should I be different and use robin's egg blue?

Blink: be different, robin's egg.

Ramble: Ok. (Continues coloring.)

Marbles: all right, Bookie want's to know, are you really blind?

Blink. Legally yes. 

Prankster: Excuse me?

Blink: Well, I need my eye patch, but without my contact in me other eye, I'm blind.

Ramble: Wait, where did you get a contact?

Blink: I have me sources.

Marbles: Why not wear glasses.

Blink: Glasses over a patch? That jist looks bad, a smile can only do so much.

Prankster: he's got a point there. 

Spot: Wait, dat's yer big secret! Yer pathetic.

Marbles: Shut up Spot, at least Blink here can get up. (to blink) you can get up right?

Blink: (almost sleezy like) oh yeah.

Prankster, Marbles, Ramble and Spot: O.O!!!!

Prankster: (looks at blink fans that are ready to jump blink) Well, Blink, thanks for coming, be sure to stop by bye!!! (throws Blink out the door) 

Spot: HEY! How come he gets to go?

Marbles: Because we love him more.

Ramble: how did you get your duct tape off?

Marbles: Yeah (sticks more duct tape on him)

Prankster: (sighs) anyway, we're going to have Racetrack on next. So feel free to send your questions.

Ramble: Can I sing?

Prankster & Marbles: NOOO!

Ramble: (pouts) fine, bye guys.

************** ****************************

there it is, sorry it's so short. Please make sure to review. Bye guys.


	5. Race, Admittin' Is Da Foist Step

Ok, I am sooooooo sorry for not updating in a long time. I got into a play and it's eating up all my time. I barely have enough time to do homework much less write anything. Anyway thank you all for understanding and reviewing….:::sniff:: I love ya guys.

Disclaimer: I don't own newsies. I own Prankster, Marbles, and Ramble. The people asking questions own themselves..I guess. Any questions? Good now onward!

***************************** ****************

Episode 5: Race gots a problem!

(Prankster, Marbles and Ramble are whispering behind Pranksters desk. Spot is still tied in his chair but he has no duct tape.)

Spot: Hey goilies, yer on!

(They look at the camera)

Marbles: oh yes we are. (Shocked) Prankster, look at this we got an audience.

Prankster: O.O How did that happen?

Marbles: Wait a minute, where's Ramble?

(Ramble walks in with a group of Spot lovers, Spot lovers are holding cameras and scream at the sight of Spot) 

Ramble: And here is the rare specimen Spot.

Spot. :O! (To Ramble) WHADDA DOIN'???

Prankster: Ramble! 

Ramble: What? This boosts our ratings!

(Prankster bangs head on desk)

Marbles: you know, she's got a point.

Prankster: (groans) ok Ramble, take 'em back to their seats please.

Ramble: Ok, (to spot lovers) You gotta go now. There will be photo ops. later. (Spot lovers groan and leave.)

Prankster: Now can you just sing so we can start this show.

Ramble: OK! I ate a watermelon, and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick 'em up they all began to shout. ---

Spot: YOU'SE ATE ME MOMMA!

Prankster, Marbles, and Ramble: O.o…… :::crickets chirp:::

Spot: (sighs) da song grows on ya. 

Ramble: tee-hee (to her sisters) see? Everyone likes the watermelon song.

Prankster: OK! (to audience) We kidnapped Racetrack for today's show.

(Racetrack fans cheer)

Marbles: yeah, yeah, yeah, ok bring him in.

(Security guard brings in a tied up Racetrack and sets him on the chair)

Ramble: Thanks Bill

(Bill walks backstage) 

Marbles: hiya Race.

Race: ummmm….hey dere, Spot! So this is where you'se disappeared to.

Spot: ya say dat like I choose ta be 'ere.

Prankster: HEY! THIS ISN'T HAPPY HOUR! SPOT SHUT UP!

Spot: why should I?

Ramble: (holds up duct tape)

Spot: (grumbles) I'll be good.

Marbles: Good, now Racetrack, the first question comes from dragonfly, she asks "If you could be one flavor of lollipop, what would you be and why."

Race. O.o….umm, I'dda be orange…it's a good flavor.

Ramble: That's it! Orange?

Racetrack: yeah.

Ramble:…ok (begins to color)

Prankster: Alright, the next question comes from Quipster she wants to know "Why do you hit Mush all the time?"

Racetrack: 'cause he likes bein' a moron, so I hit 'im.

Ramble: O.o….

Racetrack: it's a guy thin'.

Prankster, Marbles, & Ramble: OHHHHHHHH!!!!

Ramble: ok these two questions come from Bookie, first, "Do you like Medda?"

Racetrack: DAT'S JIST A RUMOR!!!!!

Spot: it's true!

(Prankster, Marbles, & Ramble stare at Spot)

Spot: (fidgets in his chair) or it was when he was 14.

Racetrack: Yeah, I grew out of it.

Ramble: Then why did you lie?

Racetrack: What was da next question?

Prankster: no! Don't change the subject, are you infatuated with Medda!

Racetrack: NO GODDAMNIT!

Ramble: (gasp) he swore!

Marbles: yes he did.

Spot: Wow Race, you'se all grown up!

Racetrack: shudup!….wait how long 'ave ya been here?

Spot: about three episodes.

Marbles: NEXT QUESTION! Bookie wants to know "do you really lose at the races or do spend it on drugs and prostitution?"

Racetrack: (to spot) did ya get these kind of questions?

(Spot nods)

Marbles: ANSWER THE QUESTION!

Racetrack: No!

Prankster: I think he's lying.

Marbles: Me too. Ramble, get out the lie detector.

Ramble: tee-hee OK! (Frolics out) 

Prankster: While we wait, hey Race, Aura wants to know, "Will you come be my sex slave?"

Racetrack: Will it get me out of here?

Marbles: Yeah.

Racetrack: god yes!

Prankster: sorry ya can't leave we have lots of questions still.

(Ramble comes in with detector starts hooking it up on Race)

Marbles: Oh Race, asp wants to know, "do you really play the harmonica?"

Racetrack: of course I'se do.

Marbles: oh and asp wants to know "Spot how did you get your name?"

Racetrack: (laughs) yeah Spot why don't ya tell 'em.

Spot: (in one breath) whenIwaslittleIhadsomanyfrecklesitlookedlikeonebigspot.

Prankster: 'cuse me!

Spot: I HAD A LOT OF FRECKLES AS A KID!

Marbles: oh ok.

Prankster: ok Racetrack, Yasashii wants to know, "how old are you and what's your real name?"

Racetrack: Oh I'se 17 and me real name's Anthony. 

Marbles: Ok Ladders wants to know, "Holyrod's favoured t' win the Belmont, how much should I put down? Also, what is dis system where t' track takes 25% and the winners have t' split? I think I been conned. One last thing. I got some spare fabric from my kilt, want me t' make you a new vest?"

Racetrack: (smiles) I'd love a new vest, Krista's gunna win, put down 75% of yer money on 'er and da new system, it's if dey gots multiple winners." 

Ramble: Ok it's hooked up.

Prankster: Ok Race, now do you really lose all your money at the races.

Races: Yes. (buzz) fine no!

Marbles: what do you spend it on?

Race: drugs (buzz) goils (buzz) FINE! CHOCOLATE COINS!

(Monitor doesn't buzz)

Spot: oh my, dat's pathetic! 

Racetrack: they're addictive!

Prankster: so wait a minute! Those chocolate coins you get at Christmas or Hanukah?

Racetrack: (nods)

Ramble: Why they're good!

Marbles: Ramble don't start!!!!

Prankster: oh look at the time, the shows over.

Racetrack: hey aren't ya gonna let me go?

Ramble: no!

Marbles: Yep, you get to stay here with Spot!

Spot: (looks away and mouths 'help me' to the camera)

Ramble: I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick 'em up they all began to shout- (spot joins) YOU(YOU'SE) ATE MY(ME) MOMMA!

Racetrack: hehehe, that's a good song.

Prankster: (sighs) ok join us next time because Mush will be joining us!

********************* ***************

wow! I wrote that all in one sitting. Yaye for me! Ok so please review and give me your questions for Mush!


	6. Mush and his'Collection'

Hiya everyone! Yeah I know, I've been really bad about updating, I'm in this play and it's eating up any free time I have….I'm sorry. Forgive me.

Thanks to all who reviewed! You guys rock! Love to reviewers!

Disclaimer: I own Prankster, Ramble and Marbles….I don't own the newsies! It's sad, but I've gotten over it. 

And now with out delay, here is episode 6!

******************** *********************

Episode 6: Mush and his…'collection'

(Prankster and Marbles are sitting in front of a closed curtain in the desk)

Prankster: (waves) hi everyone, today we interview Mush!

Marbles: Ummm…Prankster? Where's Ramble, I haven't seen her in a while.

Prankster: (looks around) and where are Spot and Race?

Marbles: (worried) I don't know, maybe they're having a three-some.

Prankster: (attempts to calm the angery Spot and Race fans) THAT'S NOT IT! Ramble would never do that, but she would torture them.

(Ramble runs in)

Ramble: Ok we're ready! (pulls the rope the curtain opens)

Prankster and Marbles: O_O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Prankster: Holy sh-

Ramble: Watch you're mouth! (turns to the boys tied in chairs) aren't they beautiful?

(Spot and Race are tied to their chairs, neither one looking very happy, Racetrack is wearing parachute pants, an ugly orange neon shirt and somehow has managed to get Farah faucet hair. Spot on the other hand has his tousers half-way up his chest, a tight shirt fit with pocket protector and the classic, broken-glasses-but-taped-together and his hair slicked back) 

Marbles: ummm…no! 

Spot: (surprisingly calm) Prankstah? Da foist thin' I'm gunna do when I'se get outta heah is rip you'se and you'se sistahs heads off!

Prankster: (pounds head on desk) Ramble I want you to take those two and get them back in their normal clothes….NOW!

Ramble: Fine, wait…I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick them up they all began to shout.

Race and Spot: (half heartedly) you'se ate me momma!

Ramble: (rolls Spot and Race's chair of the set) be right back.

Marbles: ok! NOW let's welcome Mush!

Mush: (is dragged in by random people.) hi there.

Prankster: Hi Mush, alright Qupister wants to know, "why do you, Race and Blink hit eachother all the time?"

Mush: O.o we jist do?

(Ramble walks in)

Prankster: That was fast!

Ramble: Yeah, they were eager to get their clothes off.

(Jealous fans glare at Ramble, Spot and Race are wheeled back on the set, they are in their normal clothing, except Race is still wearing his parachute pants.)

Marbles: Why are you wearing those pants?

Race: 'cause I like 'em.

Everyone: O.o…….

Race: I'se sway in da wind. 

Spot: We'se can only hope for a big wind.

Prankster: (tries not to laugh) oh Mush, next question comes from Dragonfly, she wants to know, "Why don't you keep your shirt off the ENTIRE movie?"

Race: (offended) hey! I thought she liked me!

Ramble: (puts duck tape on Race) Racetrack! You had your interview, so just sway in the wind!

(Race sways)

Mush: Well, it's New York and I'd freeze.

Marbles: In the summer?

Mush: Well truth be told all da odda's are jealous of me. Especially Spot.

Spot: Oh please.

Ramble: Shut up Spot! (pokes Spot)

Spot: Stop that!

Ramble: no (continues poking) tee-he!

Prankster: Ok this next question comes from Riot, "how'd ya get your newsie name?"

Mush: Well, most would say dat I'se toin to mush when I'se see a pretty goil. Dat's a lie. Dey call me Mush because when I'se came to da lodging house I'se was so beat up dat all I could eat was 'mush'

Ramble: (still poking) that's interesting.

(Spot is trying to bite Ramble's fingers)

Prankster: ok this one if from Riot too, she wants to know, "How did you get so buff being a street kid?"

Mush: Well you get pretty buff singing and dancing all day.

(Race and Spot nod in agreement)

Prankster: Then how come Race is never shirtless?

Race: 'cause all dose scenes were cut out.

Prankster: Oh and this is from Riot too, but it's not a question it just says, "flick Spots ears, let's see what he does!"

Spot: (in horror) O_O!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RIOT! I'SE GUNNA KILL YOU!

Ramble & Marbles: (flicks Spot's ears) yaye! Fun!

Spot: (yelling) WHY DOES GOD HATE ME?????

Ramble: Shut up! (Puts duct tape on him)

Mush: O_O umm, do I get ta leave?

Prankster: if you're good, now these questions come from Lisa, "How do you maintain your hair?"

Mush: Cold water and soap.

Prankster: again Lisa, "Are you really as innocent as you come off as?"

Mush: what?

Prankster: (still reading from card) "Do you have a girlfriend?"

Mush: No

Prankster: "Have you ever had a girlfriend?"

  
Mush: yeah, but we were six, so I don't know if dat counts.

Prankster: and Lisa's last question, "Would you be my boyfriend?"

Mush: 'cuse me do I know ya?

Prankster: probably not.

Spot: O_o

Ramble: hehehe flicking ears is fun!

Marbles: Yeah it is.

Prankster: You guys better stop it, Spot looks like he's about to explode.

Ramble and Marbles: Ok for now!

Ramble: I'll read the questions now! (Takes card) Ok Mush, "Would you ever think of striating your hair?"

Mush: O_O! No! Not me hair. 

(Prankster, Marbles and Ramble smile in excitement, Spot and Race give Mush a you-shouldn't-have-done-that-you-moron look) 

Ramble: Ok last question, Blinks-Tiger wants to know, "are you Kid Blink's gay lover, because I've heard stories." 

Mush: (rushed) no, Blink and I 'ave no relationship besides friendship?

Marbles: O.o That line sounds awfully rehearsed.

Prankster: Yes! I think he's lying!

Ramble: (excited) Should I get the lie detector?

Prankster: no! (Smiles evilly) Get me a hair straightener!

Ramble: OK! (Runs out)

(Spot and Race shake their heads)

Mush: O.O no! Not me hair.

Marbles: Then answer us truthfully.

Mush: What do you want?

Marbles: We want the truth!

Mush: YOU CAN'T HANDLE DA TRUTH!!!!!

Prankster: Didn't we go through this with Medda?

Mush: Medda was on 'ere?

Prankster: Yep.

(Ramble runs in, with hair straightener)

Ramble: Mission successful, but we better use it quick before Bob Barker comes in here.

Prankster: 'K plug it in!

(Ramble plugs it in)

Mush: Ok, Ok, I'll talk, Blink's me dealer, but he ain't me lover.

Ramble: What do you mean….dealer?

Mush: (looks at floor ashamed) he sells me…stamps to lick…..but I'se can quit any time I want, I'se not addicted.

(Race nods)

Ramble: Wait a minute (rips duct tape off Race)

Race: Ow!

Ramble: Where do you get your coins?

Race: Blink's me dealer.

Ramble: I knew that Blink wasn't to be trusted!

Marbles: (skeptically) Yeah I bet you did. 

Prankster: So wait a minute, you're addicted to the glue in stamps?

Mush: I'se not addicted, I 'ave a slight liking of the flavor.

Ramble: So that settles it, you can't leave until you're cured!

Marbles: and Race too, you two can't leave until you've been cured.

Prankster: and I know many would love to have the chance to 'cure' Spot, but that is out of the question, he's just here to torture.

Marbles: So are we done?

Prankster: (looks at notes) Yeah, we are, turn in next time for we will have Specs.

Race: Da poor boy.

Ramble: (to Race) you know his secret?

Race: Yeah, it's weird.

Marbles: Ramble, wait until next episode, aren't you going to sing?

Ramble: Oh Yeah! (Rips off Spot's duct tape)

Spot: OW!

Ramble: I ate a watermelon, and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick 'em up, they all began to shout…

Spot/Race/Ramble: You (you'se) ate my (me) momma!

Mush: Race, why are ya wearin' dose pants?

Prankster: (pounds head on desk)

Ramble: (waves) bye!!!!!

Spot: (mouths) God help us!

************************ *******************

and that's it. (smiles) hehehe, well please send your questions for Specs. I love reviews! They keep me alive….well no they don't. I lied, sorry. Anyway, that's it for chapter 6 have a nice day!


	7. That Can't Be Normal Specs

::: Lysaka slowly goes on stage ::: Hiya everyone, I know that it's been a long…long time since I've last updated, but I've been so busy I barely had time to check my e-mail, much less write a chapter. I know, shame on me for having a social life, but I'm back and better then ever. 

Thank Yous: I'd like to thank all who are reviewing, because this fic can not exist without people reviewing, I took a leap of faith writing this and I'm glad you are all enjoying it. 

Job Application: I've decided that "The Left Shoe Show" needs a crew. (camara opperators/ announcers/ hair and make up/ security guards) If you'd like to be one please leave a review and what you want to be. (maybe a little on your personality) They won't be big parts, but your name will be mentioned and maybe you'll have a couple lines. Except the announcer. But the announcer must have a love for teasing Spot. Not IN LOVE with Spot. But A LOVE of TEASING Spot.

Wow this is long, I didn't mean to type this much. ON WITH THE FIC!!!!!!

******************************** ******************

Episode 7: That Can't Be Normal

Prankster: (waves) Hiya everyone, today we get to have the lovely Specs on!

(Audience Applause) 

Marbles: Prankster, before you go any further you better let Ramble and the boys sing 'The Watermelon Song' before they pop.

Ramble: We're not singing the watermelon song.

(record skid)

Prankster: Are you feeling ok? (feels Ramble's forehead)

Ramble: I'M FINE! We're gunna sing a different song! (clears throat) There are no bananas in the sky, in the sky. There are no bananas in the sky, in the sky. There's a sun, there's a moon, there's a coconut cream pie BUT…….there are no bananas in the sky, in the sky.

(crickets chirp)

Ramble: What do ya think?

(Prankster pounds head on desk)

Marbles: (in fear) I want 'The Watermelon Song' back.

Ramble: (pouts) You two are no fun!

Prankster: BACK to business, we have another person to introduce before we get Specs out. We've decided to take on an intern. Please welcome Bookie!

(Bookie walks out, applause)

Bookie: Hi (waves) 

Prankster: Ok now that we've done that, Bookie can you roll Specs out for me.

Bookie: Sure (frolics off)

(Ramble is at her desk…coloring of course)

Ramble: Spot should I use eggshell white, or polar bear white?

Spot: (doesn't even look at crayons, in monotone voice) Egg shell.

(Ramble is about to protest but Bookie comes on, rolling Specs tied in the chair, Bookie goes to fast and lets go. Specs is rolled out of camera view…)

Specs: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

(The sound of metal trash cans falling over and a cat screeching) 

Bookie: (meekly) oops.

(Boys are in hysterics, Ramble and Prankster struggle not to laugh, Marbles is pounding her head on the desk)

Bookie: Sorry.

Prankster: That's ok, just go get him.

Bookie: OK! (Frolics off) 

Race: I feel sorry for Specs.

Spot: Wait, is 'e da one dat has da strange a-

Race: (cuts him off) Yeah

Spot: Whoa.

Bookie: (comes in, Spec looks panicked) here he is.  


Specs: O_O I tink I'll start drinkin' decaf.

Ramble: Hiya Specs! We're here to interview you!

Prankster: Ya, better get started you have a lotta questions. You're very popular.

Specs: How? I'se only say two lines in da movie.

Marbles: well, a lot of girls in the audience are here for you, we even had to remove a couple topless girls.

(The boys look out at the audience.)

Mush: (groaning) How could I 've missed dat?  


Specs: Wow, topless goils for me?

Ramble: Actually they were here for Spot.

All boys & Prankster: Figures.

Bookie: OK! First question, this is from….hehehe me, I wanna know, "Why is your hat different then the rest of the newsies?"

Specs: ummm I likes bein' different.

Race: (mutters) dat ain't all he likes.

Bookie: What was that?

Race: (smiles) nothin'

Bookie: O.o right, my next question is from…me, I wanna know, "What's going on between you and Dutchy?"

Specs: we're friends?

Everyone: O.o

Marbles: (skeptically) sure, I wanna read questions. (snags the cards from Bookie) You can flick Spots ears now Bookie.

Bookie: Yaye! (flick, flick, flick)

Spot: I hate you'se goils. 

(Ramble puts duct tape over his mouth)

Marbles: Ok, these questions come from Hot Shot, 1 "Are you really as smart as everyone thinks?"

Specs: Whoa, people think I'm smart?

Prankster: (shrugs) I guess.

Specs: Well, I guess I'm smarta then some of da oudda newsies. (everyone looks at Spot) But I ain't no genius.

Ramble: (sniff) well said.

Prankster: Go back to your coloring.

Marbles: 2 "Do ya have a girlfriend?"

Specs: no

(Specs fans scream with delight)

Marbles 3 "How old are you?"

Specs: I think I'm 18.

Marbles: think?

Specs: Well, we don't know when I was born.

Ramble: Oh that's so sad, here have a crayon.

Specs: O.o uuuhhhh thanks.

Prankster: I'll read the questions now! (grabs cards) ok, this is from Breeze, "what's going on between you and Dutchy?"

Specs: NOTHIN'!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Would'ja stop askin'!

Ramble: Hey there's 30 exclamation points in that last sentence!

Everyone: O.o

Prankster: oh and Breeze wants to say she finds Race adorable.

Bookie: Ramble can you flick Spots ears now, I need to do some show business.

Ramble: Sure.

(Bookie leaves to do show business, Ramble flicks Spots ears)

Prankster: ok Riot wants to know, "How did you get the money to pay for your glasses?"

Specs: oh, Kloopy lent me da money, I paid 'im back.

Prankster: Riot also wants to know "Can you see very well without your glasses?"

Specs: I'm as blind as a bat without 'em.

Ramble: I wanna read, (grabs cards) Marbles, poke Spot an' Race.

Marbles: Ok, (poke poke poke)

Spot & Race: :0

Ramble: Ok this is from Dragonfly, "If you had a peacock what would name it?"

Specs: I wouldn't 'ave a peacock, dere noisy.

Ramble: SAD! Ok these last questions are from Cards, "Has anyone noticed Spot and Race, (and now Mush) are missing?"

Specs: Oh yeah, Jack had a search party an everythin', but aftah two hours we 'ad ta face facts dat dey were killed, we've gotten over them.

Race: Nice ta know I'm loved.

Ramble: and Cards wants to know, "How did you get a fedora, when they weren't popular until the 20's?"

Specs: I made it, I'm a trendsetter.

Prankster: Wait a minute, we're out of questions, and we still don't know his big secret.

Race: I know!

Specs: (to Race) don't ya dare!

Race: Sorry buddy, but we're all sufferin' Look at Spot.

(Marbles is still flicking Spots ears)

Ramble: What is it?

Specs: Don' tell 'em.

Race: it ain't that bad.

Specs: What could be worse?

Race: Spot's impotent.

Spot: Hey!

Specs: wow that is worse, ok tell 'em.

Race: Specs here has a strange attraction ta llamas.

Girls: LLAMAS?

Specs: yes llamas, llamas are neat.

Everyone: O.o

Ramble: We should watch the Empirer's New Groove!

Prankster: You can.

Ramble: YAYE! (tries to run out)

Marbles: You need to sing…..The Watermelon song!

Ramble: YAYE! 

Ramble and boys, minus Specs: I (I'se) ate a watermelon, and (an') all the (da) seeds fell out, and (an') when I (Is'e) went to pick them ('em) up they all began to shout. YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

(ramble giggles)

Specs: Dat's da best song evah!

Spot: Everyone thinks so.

Prankster: Ok, come back for the 8th episode. Jack will be joining us. That's right.

Spot: Jacky-boy's gunna die.

Mush: he really is.

Marbles: Ok, remember to send your questions, bye.

************************** *********************

OK that's it, remember to send in your questions for Jack. Also if you want to be on the lovely "Left Shoe Show Crew" Please review and tell me. (remember to tell me what part you want) well bye!


	8. Lepidopterophobia and Jack?

Oh my god, this has been my longest chapter, I know you're anxious to read so I won't keep you.

Thanks: Thank you to every person who ever reviewed!

Disclaimer: I don't own the newsies. Prankster, Ramble and Marbles are mine. Any other name you don't recognize, they belong to themselves

Alright time for chapter 8…Jack

***************** **************************

Chapter 8 Lepidopterophobia and….Jack?

(Prankster, Marbles and Ramble are sitting at the desk, 'Ramble is coloring of course', but the area is much more crowded on the floor. For 19 new people have been hired, 'and when we say "hired" we mean that they are here working for pocket lint,' all in the name of finding the newsies secrets. Spot, Race AND Mush are tied in their chairs, Specs is no where to be found.)

Announcer: (after applause dies down) And now it's time for the funniest show this side of the Mississippi….The Left Shoe Show!

Prankster & Marbles: O.o

Ramble: Yaye! I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick 'em up they all began to shout.

Ramble and guys: YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA! (Ramble giggles)

Prankster: (sighs) Thank you Riot. (That's right, Riot is the announcer) Now we have to get going, we have a LOT of questions for Jack, as soon as Bookie and the others get here.

(on cue, Bookie, Hotshot, Frecks, and Dreamy roll on a bound and tied Jack, Jack struggles)

Hotshot: Give it up Jack, you're gunna be here for awhile!

Marbles: Thank you Hotshot. (Hotshot & others leave) 

Ramble: Hiya Jack! (waves)

(Jack sees Spot, Race and Mush)

Jack: O.O yer alive?!?!

Race: yeah an' I 'ope ya wasted a lot of time on me eulogy!

Spot: (bitter) I 'ope dey make ya cry, Jacky-boy

Ramble: (shakes head) Now don't be bitter, we have to interview Jack!

Prankster: Right you are! Ok first question comes from Gears, she wants to know, "is it true that bandana covers up hickeys given to you by Davey when you and him and Denton have a threesome?"

Jack: What? no! No hickeys!

Ramble: (takes off bandana) Hey, he ain't lying! (waves bandana around) whee!

Jack: Give me dat!

Ramble: (pouts) Fine! (throws bandana in his lap) there!

Prankster: NEXT QUESTION! Is from Gears also, she asks, "do you really want to go to Santa Fe or are you just saying that so people will beg you to stay in New York with them and you get lots of attention?" 

Race: Yeah, dat really is a cry for attention.

Marbles: Excuse me Racetrack, but I think your interview is done, so unless you want one of our staff to give you a make-over I suggest you shut up!

(Racetrack growls)

Ramble: I WANNA READ THE QUESTIONS! (takes cards) ok this is from Quipster, she wants to know, "Why do you steal the tomatoes on the roof? And WHY do it so obviously? He does it RIGHT in front of Sarah...I mean come on he had all night to sneak up there and steal them.." 

Jack: Actually, da tomato was rotten.

Race: (scoffs) A likely story.

Prankster: That's it! (yells) GLITTER, LISA, GET OUT HERE!

(Glitter and Lisa walk on)

Glitter: yes?

Prankster: Grab Racetrack, he's just earned himself a makeover, let's go, Bookie fill in for me.

Bookie: Ok, (sits in Prankster's chair)

(Glitter, Lisa and Prankster leave with a scared Racetrack, Spot hums 'The funeral march')

Jack: O.O maybe it would've been better if you were dead.

Spot: I've been sayin' dat for da last couple episodes.

Ramble: Ok, this question is from Quipster too, "Why does Jack feel the need to hit the poor defenseless stockings?"

Marbles: Yeah, what did those stockings do to you?

Jack: wow if I knew I was ta be tested I would've studied, well, I was bored an' needed somethin' ta do, so I 'it the stockings.

Bookie: Ok now, Hotshot wants to know, "What exactly do you plan on doing once you get to Santa Fe?"

Jack: Oh, well, I'se gunna get a ranch an' lots of horses an' cattle an' be a cowboy!

Marbles: (mutters) good luck with that.

Ramble: Marbles, you're being unusually bitter today.

Marbles: Oh thank you for noticing, shouldn't you be coloring?

Bookie: Girls! You're done! Fight after the show! Hotshot also wants to know, "Are you as much of an 'egotistical bastard' as Spot?"

Jack: almost, but not quite.

Marbles: Ok Blinks-Tiger, and a lot more girls want to know, "Why Sarah?!?!?!"

Jack: O.o…why not?

Ramble: (fast) Well, some girls don't want you going out with Sarah, because they don't you and her are a good match, personally, I think they're jealous because now you're taken. Though others just find her annoying.

Everyone: O.o

Spot: Thank you Ramble.

Ramble: no problem whatsoever.

Jack: hey! I'm not gunna defend me relationship with Sarah 'cause I shouldn't hafta.

(Jack fans think of a plot to kill Sarah. Glitter, Lisa, and Prankster roll Race out)

Spot: O.O oh my.  


(Racetrack is wearing drag queen make-up, his hair is nice and fluffy. His clothes are the same except for a big yellow feather boa is wrapped around his neck)

Glitter: He's missing something.

Lisa: I agree

Prankster: perhaps "attack of the pixie"?

Glitter: oh yes of course! 

(Glitter takes out some glitter)

Glitter: ATTACK OF THE PIXIE!!!! (Throws glitter on Racetrack)

Ramble: Oh he's sparkly!

  
Race: (sputters) ack! 

Marbles: Well, he'll be as quiet as Mush for a while.

Mush: (smiles)

Marbles: Good boy, here, have a chocolate coin.

(Race growls, but says nothing)

Bookie: Umm ladies?

Prankster: yes?

Bookie: You're supposed to be interviewing Jack.

Marbles: Oh yeah, (looks at her card) Moods wants to know, "Why do you like Medda, she's 58."

Jack: She's nice ta us newsies.

Spot: I think Moods meant, "why do you LIKE Medda?"

Jack: O.o (confused) she's nice?

Prankster: Bah! We'll skip it and see if we can come back, this is only a half-an-hour show.

Ramble: Wait we have a time limit?

Prankster: Yeah, we do now.

Marbles: (ignoring her sisters) Ok, Cards wants to know, "You own a newsie hat, why don't you wear it?"

Jack: I like me cowboy hat better.

Marbles: She also want's to know, "Are you aware that there are girls who you have never met that want to shag you senseless?"

(Rapid fan girls scream, Cards, Sparks, Shortie, and Capy do their best to restrain them.)

Jack: I do now.

Marbles: And Cards' last question, "Now that you know that the boys are not dead do you feel really stupid?"

(Spot, Race and Mush send dirty looks, Jack looks away)

Jack: Jist a little, but where's Specs.

Prankster: Yeah where is he….(screams) BOOKIE!!!!!!

(Bookie runs out) 

Prankster: Where's Specs?

Bookie: Oh he's in the green room.

Everyone: O.o

Bookie: He's watching 'The Discovery Channel' it's shark week you know.

Ramble: IT'S SHARK WEEK! Prankster, I wanna watch shark week with Specs.

Prankster: (pounds head on desk) NO! You're interviewing.

Bookie: We're taping it.

Ramble: O.O (hugs Bookie) I LOVE THIS GIRL, (to Prankster) can we keep her….please.

(Bookie shakes her head)

Prankster and Marbles: NO!

(Bookie runs out of the room, Ramble sits back down)

Prankster: Ok (grabs cards) Next question is from, Frenchy DeWolfe, "Jack, how old are ya?"

Jack: 17

Prankster: Oh Ramble, Frenchy requests that you flick Spots ears.

Ramble: Ok, (flick, flick)

Spot: Grrrrr

Prankster: Ok, Rhapsody wants to know, "Do ya ever get annoyed with Les?"

Jack: (laughs) nah! If anything it's Davey that get's annoying.

Ramble: Oh so the truth comes out. 

Prankster: Next question, is from Riot, "Do you realize how many people say they're related to you?"

Jack: Yeah, but who can blame 'em?

Ramble: true.

(Spot rolls his eyes, Race is kicking his legs)

Marbles: Does Race STILL have those parachute pants?

(Race nods his head)

Prankster: Riot wants to know, "Have you always been the Manhattan leader?"

Jack: Yep, since the dawn of time.

Ramble: Hey! (Smacks Jack) Sarcasm is Race's specialty, not yours.

Prankster: and lastly from Riot "How did you meet Spot?"

Spot: Oh dear god.

Jack: We met in da refuge.

Prankster: Ok Kaylee wants to know, "Jack, do you consider yourself a babe?"

Jack: Well, I don't wanna make da oudda's jealous, but yeah.

Marbles: (scoffs) 

Jack: Ah, you know I'm cute.

Marbles: cute? I think Spot is cuter then you.

(Spot grins)

Ramble: Ohhhhhh, want some ice for that burn?

Spot: HEY! 

(Race & Mush are cracking up)

Prankster: Marbles 1, Jack 0!

Jack: (growls) what's the next question?

Prankster: Oh this one is from The Omniscient Bookseller, she wants to know, "How old were you when you became a newsie?"

Jack: I was 7.

Prankster: TOB wants to know, "What on earth was the hand clappy thing in Seize the Day?"

Jack: Hey, dat's what the choreographer told us to do. So I did.

Ramble: He's got a point.

Prankster: TOB wants to know, "Tells us the story about Roosevelt and the carriage."

Jack: There's not much to tell, Roosevelt came, and I snuck under the carriage and rode out.

Prankster: Again from TOB, "How did you really get into the refuge?"

Jack: Would you believe me if I said I killed someone?

Ramble: no

Jack: Damn, alright, "I kicked Snyder an' ran."

Ramble: That's it.

Jack: that's it.

Prankster: Alright and last question from TOB, "Did you ever had any siblings?"

Jack: nope, I'm an only child.

Ramble: I WANNA READ! (Grabs cards) Ok Splash wants to know, "Since all the guys that are missing are assumed dead, who's going to be the new leader?"

Jack: (sigh) I 'ope they don't pick Davey

Ramble: Aki wants to know, "Where in the world did you get that cruddy old hat and bandana?"

Jack: Hey! I bought those.

Ramble: (hands up in defense) I didn't ask blame her. (Points to our card holder Aki, Aki smiles and waves)

Jack: (mumbles) I got your cruddy ol' had and bandana right here.

Marbles: My turn! (Grabs cards) Ok, Monday wants to know, "What's with you and Les?"

Jack: He's better then David.

Ramble: Too true.

Marbles: and Monday also wants to know, "If you were a swallow and you wanted to carry a coconut to your aunt's barmitzvah would there be a moose involved?"

Jack: O.o (whispers to Spot) I ain't Jewish.

Spot: (whispers back) Just say no.

Jack: No.

Marbles: Ok, Asp wants to know, "What are you doing to Denton's chair when you're putting it down during KoNY?"

Jack: I'm putting it down?

Ramble: I like how you answered that in the form of a question. (smiles and returns to coloring)

Marbles: Ok Lisa wants to know, "Does it hurt when Mush hits you?"

Jack: Nah!

Prankster: It's the male pride, he won't admit it.

Jack: Hey!

Marbles: Next question is from Shortie, "is Les hot in person?"

Jack: He's 10, and I'm not one to judge.

Prankster: Well put.

Marbles: Capy wants to know, "What came first, the nickname or Santa Fe?"

Jack: The nickname.

Marbles: Again Capy, "Be honest, did you just picked up a book and picked Santa Fe at random?"

Jack: Actually that is how it happened.

Race: MY TURN! 

Everyone: O.o

Prankster: Sorry Race it's my turn! (grabs cards) Ok Dreamy wants to know, "What's your favorite color?"

Jack: Red.

Prankster: Again Dreamy, "Do you like being called Cowboy?"

Jack: Nah! Not really.

Prankster: Ok Galaxy wants to know, "if you're not scared of Spot, why do you bring Boots and David along?"

Spot: Yeah.

Jack: Well, I don't wanna walk all the way to Brooklyn without anyone to talk to. An' dere's safety in numbers!

Marbles: YES!

Prankster: Ok Galaxy again, "If you're not scared of Pulitzer then why do you bring Les along?"

Jack: Well, Les is cute. Cuter sells to adults.

Ramble: Yeah, it's like trying to sell Girl Scout cookies. We older girls can't sell 'em, the younger ones though, those go fast.

Prankster: true, Ok these questions are from Butterfly.

Jack: BUTTERFLY O.O!!!!!!!

Prankster: yeah Butterfly.

Jack: Did you say….Butterfly?

Prankster: Read my lips, But-ter-fly.

Jack: O.O I'm not answerin' any questions from Butterfly!

Marbles: Why?

Spot, Race, and Mush: why?

Jack: Because butterfly's are evil that's why!

Ramble: Prankster, I think Jack has Lepidopterophobia.

(crickets chirp)

Prankster: And taking that out of Ramble language and putting it into normal English is….?

Ramble: Jack's afraid of Butterfly's he's a Lepidopterophobiac.

Marbles: Ramble, how do you know that?

Ramble: What doesn't everybody?

Prankster: No!

Ramble: oh.

Marbles: Well, I guess we know Jacks secret, it's time to end the show.

Jack: so I get to leave?

(Prankster & boys laughs)

Jack: A simple 'no' would've worked.

Ramble: ok, (sings) I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick them up they all began to shout.

Ramble & boys: YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

Jack: Wow What a good song.

Ramble: I know.

Prankster: Ok please send your questions for Boots. He'll be in the next episode. 

Riot: (you know our announcer) This has been a production of The Left Shoe Show.

******************* **************************************

There you go, Now I'm going to list everyone one and what they're jobs are. If you weren't in this chapter, I'm sorry, I'll make sure your name gets mentioned soon.

Here we go:

Newsie Getters: Hotshot, Frecks, and Dreamy.

Camera Girls: Moods, Rhapsody, and Falco.

Rapid Fan Girl Restrainer: Cards, Sparks, Shortie, and Capy.

Hair and Make-up: Glitter and Lisa.

Announcer: Riot.

Sound: Aura

Lights: Splash

Card Holder: Aki.

Mascot: Monday.

Food Bringer. (in our opinion this is the MOST IMPORTANT job): Butterfly

Newsie Torturer: Galaxy

Intern: Bookie

Ok please review so we have questions for Boots.


	9. The Real Marti Mcfly Boots?

Sorry about the no update in a long time. Life happened. Anyway, here's Boot's chapter.

Thank you's: Thanks to my reviewers and (balloons come out) Congrats Galaxy, our 100th reviewer.

Disclaimer: the newsies aren't mine. I've accepted this and you should to. Not making a cent off this. 

************************** ******************

Chapter 9 The Real Marti Mcfly…Boots?

Riot: Welcome back to "The Left Shoe Show." After long delays of finals and doing last minute projects, The Left Shoe Show is back with our special guest, Boots. (audience applause) And here are your hosts Prankster, Marbles and Ramble. (Audience Applause)

Marbles: O.o…..thank you Riot.

Prankster: Welcome back, I'm really excited about our low-budget show we've put on, and with everyone's boot loving newsie, Boots, it should be an interesting show and….(looks around) Marbles? Where's Ramble?

Marbles: And the guys? (looks around.)

Prankster & Marbles: (at the same time) BOOKIE!!!!!!!

(Bookie runs out)

Prankster: Where's Ramble?

Marbles: Yeah, she needs to sing the theme song or else her head will explode or something.

Bookie: Umm….she's in the back with the boys, they're doing something for the theme. A lot of the crew are involved too.

Prankster: Like who? 

Bookie: oh just a few, Rhapsody, Falco, Aura, Splash, Monday, Lisa, Butterfly, (coughs) Me ummm…..

Marbles: maybe this will be easier, who is NOT involved?

Bookie: Well, after careful calculations and doing many head counts….just you two.

Prankster: (pounds head on desk) What are you doing?

Bookie: Oh the boys and us are doing a short part of "Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen.

Marbles: O.o Like in Wayne's World?

Bookie: Exactly, well gotta run. (runs out)

Prankster: Well this is unexpected…party on Wayne.

Marbles: Party on Garth.

(Band starts playing, Curtain opens, all the boys are tied in their chairs on one side of the stage, the girls on the other.)

Spot: I see a little silhouetto of a man  


Everyone: Scaramouch, scaramouch will you do the fandango  
Thunderbolt and lightning - very very frightening me  
Gallileo, Gallileo,  
Gallileo, Gallileo,  
Gallileo Figaro - magnifico

Spot: But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me  


Boys: He's just a poor boy from a poor family  
Spare him his life from this monstrosity  


Spot: Easy come easy go - will you let me go  


Girls: Bismillah! No - we will not let you go 

Boys: let him go  


Girls: Bismillah! We will not let you go 

Boys: let him go  


Girls: Bismillah! We will not let you go 

Boys: let me go  


Girls: Will not let you go 

Boys: let me go 

Monday: never 

Girls: Never let you go 

Boys: let me go  
Never let me go - ooo  


Girls: No, no, no, no, no, no, no –  


Boyd: Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go  


Spot: Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me  


Boys: for me  
for me

(Let the head banging begin)

Spot: So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye  
So you think you can love me and leave me to—(Prankster interrupts)

Prankster: (record skid) OK YOU'RE DONE!

  
(Girls and Newsies groan) 

Prankster: What do you think I'm paying you for?

Cards: (getting back to her camera) We're getting paid?

Prankster: Well…no…it was just an expression…ummm WHERE'S BOOTS?

Frecks: (comes out) We got him. (Hotshot, and Dreamy roll a tied up Boots on stage audience applause)

Ramble: Thank you girls, Butterfly (Jack cringes) has some food for you.

(newsie nappers leave)

Boots: umm hi guys, Race, why are you wearing parachute pants? That's so 1980's.

Prankster: O.o (suspicious) How do you know?

Boots: One of the girls back stage was commenting on his pants.

Race: (grins) So you girl talk 'bout me?

Boots: I wouldn't flatter yourself, Glitter said something 'bout trying some cool colors on ya, she's sayin' that your defiantly a winter…what ever that means, do you know what that means Race?

Race: Umm….PRANKSTAH! Don't you have questions for Boots here?

Prankster: we can wait 'til you're done squirming. Hehehe

Marbles: READ THE QUESTIONS

Prankster: alright, alright chill. Ok Boots, first question oddly enough from Glitter, "Has anyone ever told you that by the time you're around 22, your alter ego will play a certain substitute teacher on the Disney show, "Lizzie McGuire"?"

Boots: No….but I'll be on T.V.? Cool.

Ramble: Yeah it will be…hey! How do you know what a T.V. is?

Boots: I was watching it with Specs in the green room. It's shark week!

Marbles: It's a tape of shark week.

Prankster: Next question, from Glitter too, "Is that a digital watch you have on when you're pumping it up for Jack and Les at Pulitzer's door? Is it? Hmmmmmm Bootsy boy?!"

Boots: I choose to take the 5th.

Marbles: How do you know what the 5th is?

Prankster: Ohh, an educated newsie, this is a first. (everyone stares at Spot, who's staring at his reflection)

Spot: HEY! (goes back to staring)

Prankster: ok, these next set of questions are from Cards, and unless I say anything different, it's Cards, first question, "How the Fecking Frell do you spend a month one night in Brooklyn?"

Boots: (breaks down) TIME TRAVEL!!! 

Marbles: What?

Boots: You heard me, time travel. I'm the real Marti Mcfly.

Prankster: Like in 'Back to the Future'?

Boots: yeah, that's why I have the watch, and I spent a month in Brooklyn in one night.

Ramble: cool.

Prankster: wow! Alright next question, "Do you find it the least strange that Kid Blink went to Harlem... Shouldn't someone else (Like someone not white) have gone?"  


Boots: Nah! That's where Blink does most of his deals, everyone knows him.

Prankster: "Who is Mud?"  


Boots: The Professor.

Prankster: you mean the guy Christopher Lloyd played?

Boots: Yep.

Prankster: "Why can't he stand Blood?"

Boots: that's the way he is.

Prankster: "Why do you sing about him?"

Boots: 'Cause he's off in Hollywood makin' money on our story, and I'm stuck in 1899.

Prankster: "Why do you sleep with one boot?"

Boots: How do you think I got the name Boots?

Prankster: "If you like Boots so much, why not black Boots?"

Boots: It ain't like I got much of a choice.

Ramble: Prankster, you're done, I wanna read, (grabs cards away from Prankster) Ok Boots, still from Cards, "Did you know you have a very small fanbase?"

Boots: I have fans?

Spot: well not as much as me, but ya gotta admit, you're pretty likeable. 

Marbles: Galaxy!

(Galaxy runs out)

Marbles: Flick Spots ears!

Galaxy: OK (flick flick flick)

Spot: grrrrr.

Boots: O.O isn't that illegal? 

Prankster: No, we have fan approval.

Boots: oh

Ramble: next question, "Who is the leader now?"

Boots: (groans) David. (all newsies groan)

Jack: ya gotta let me back Prankstah!

Prankster: No!

Ramble: ignore them, "How have you explained the lack of bodies?"

Boots: we haven't, really a lot of 'em are sitting in a corner scared shitless, 'cept Blink and Jake. Jake doesn't talk much anymore, and Blink keeps lookin' at us like he knows who's next.

Ramble: But Jake's a mute.

All newsies: HE'S A MUTE? 

Jack: well, that explains a lot.

(Prankster pounds head on desk)

Ramble: "Why did you give Spot rocks when he might just fling them back at you?"

Spot: (coughs) they were marbles.

Marbles: (mimics cough) doesn't matter.

Boots: Spot wouldn't shot my gift back at me…(sniff) would he?

(everyone looks at Spot)

Spot: what? NO! This is Boots' interview, leave me alone.

(Galaxy's still flicking his ears)

Ramble: "Are you sick of the questions yet?"

Boots: yes

Ramble: "Have you ever stolen a hat?"  


Boots: No.

Ramble: "Do you like Dark Chocolate?"

Boots: umm…yes?

Ramble: "Do you thing something is going on between Specs and Dutchy?"

Boots: they're in love…they jist don't know it yet. 

Monday: ('The Left Shoe Show' Mascot runs in) Ha! I won the poll, pay up all of you.

(Cast & Crew groan as they dig through their pockets)

Ramble: Ignore them, "Do you think there is a use for Algebra in real life?"  


Boots: Only if you're buildin' a time machine, ouddawise….no.

Prankster: I KNEW IT!

Marbles: Yeah and everyone else on this god forsaken planet. 

Prankster: Shut-up, It's your turn to read.

Marbles: (melodramatic) whoopie, forgive me for not doing back-flips.

Ramble: You can do back flips?

Spot: ok, sweetheart, she was bein' sarcastic.

Ramble: SWEETHEART!

Prankster: Oh boy you've done it.

Ramble: GLITTER! WE GOT ANOTHER MAKE-OVER!

(Ramble pushes Spot out, Spot looks like he's about to die)

Marbles: Anyway, (picks up cards) Ok this question is from, Aki, she wants to know, "Where did you get those marbles for Spot? Did you steal them?"

Boots: I didn't steal them…I borrowed them.

Prankster: yep! Always borrow.

Marbles: Ok Hotshot wants to know, "Why are you scared of Spot?"

Boots: Because he's mean. He's got the personality of overcooked bacon. 

Prankster: wow! That's a Ramble analogy if I ever heard one.

Ramble: (smiles) yep…bacon tee-hehehe

Marbles: Hotshot also wants to know, "How old are you?"

Boots: 14

Ramble: I wouldn't lie.

Boots: fine 13.

Ramble: hey! No lie detector this time.

Marbles: what do ya know? Moving on, Rhapsody asks "Why does Kloppy seem so eager to wake you up? Do you two have something going on?"

Boots: He likes to see me jump, the stupid bas-

Ramble: (Gasp)

Boots: Bass fish.

Ramble: (Gasp)

Boots: Are you ok?

Ramble: oh yeah. (smiles)

Everyone: O.o (moves their chairs away from Ramble)

Prankster: Wait! Ramble! Wheren't you with Spot? 

Ramble: Alright, I'll go back.

(Spot screams from backstage)

Ramble: I guess Spot discovered what mascara is. (leaves)

Marbles: Ok this one's from Butterfly, (Jack jumps) O.o yeah, she wants to know, "Do you find it fun trading marbles with Spot?"

Boots: not really, it's just business. Peace-offering.

Prankster: I'll read, (takes cards) alright, this is from, Dragonfly (FRAGONDLY!!!) she wants to know, "why are your pants so short?"

Boots: oh, well when I came to 1899, I needed pants and well, this is all I got.

Prankster: Aura wants to know, "Did you know that Jack is afraid of butterflys?"

Boots: No I did not, I guess it's a good thing he doesn't know 'bout Kloppy's butterfly collection.

Jack: WHAT?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!

Boots: kidding!

Prankster: I love this kid, can we keep him?

Marbles: no.

Prankster: Please?

Marbles: No!

Prankster: alright, Aura also wants to know, "Do you like bunny rabbits? If so... what color?"

Boots: Umm…white

Prankster: last question from Aura, "Why do you yell off the Brooklyn Bridge?"

Boots: I'm a teen-aged boy, does anythin' I do make sense.

Marbles: Point.

Prankster yep, of this question's from The Omniscient Bookseller, she asks, "What's that thing you do with your hat when the girl walks by outside of the DC?"

Boots: I take it off my head?

Prankster: "Why did you become a newsie?" 

Boots: Well, I needed a job, an' lucky for me, Jacky-boy gave me a job.

(Ramble enters and sits back down)

Marbles: Where's Spot?

Ramble: He'll be joining us shortly, my turn to read. (grabs questions) ok Dreamy wants to know, "Do you like Brooklyn?"

Boots: Not really.

(Spot is rolled out, pouting about his makeover)

Spot: When I get free each and everyone of you girls are gunna be dead.

Riot: Well that's all the time for The Left Shoe Show.

Marbles: But we got a ton of more questions.

Riot: Sorry there's a ten page limit.

Ramble: 10-page limit?

Prankster: I don't remember that! (takes out 'Talk Show writing for dummies') Hey what do you know, 10-page limit, even had it underlined. Sorry for all who didn't get your questions asked. 

Marbles: Somehow I think they'll live.

Riot: (announces) join us next time when Crutchy will be our guest so send you questions by clicking the review button.

Prankster: Thank you Riot.

Ramble: I ate a watermelon, and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick them up they all began to shout.

Ramble & Boys: You (you'se) ate my (me) momma!

Boots: Wow! That's the best song.

Ramble: Isn't it.

(Prankster slams head against desk)

******************************** **********

ok, Crutchy is up next. Send in your reviews quick. Well bye.  


  
  


  


  


  


  


  
  


  


  
  


  
  


  
  


  


  


  
  


  


  
  



	10. Crutchy and a Spine?

Hey guys, I'm sick, and because I've missed three days of school and nothing for me to do. I've been working on this. So this is the something good that comes out of being sick. Enjoy.

Thanks: To everyone who reviewed and all of you that have the patience to wait for me while I update.

Disclaimer: Newsies is a product of the Disney co. and I'm not making a dime off this story. The only characters I own are Prankster, Marbles and Ramble. All others belong to themselves or are slaves to the Disney co. 

Episode 10 Crutchy and a spine? Maybe next time a brain.

******************** **********************************************

(Drum Roll) Riot: It's time for the well-reviewed, hilarious talk show, "The Left Shoe Show"

(Applause)

(Prankster, Marbles, & Ramble are at the oversize desk, Ramble is of course coloring, Spot, Race, Jack & Mush are tied to their chairs, Boots and Specs are no where to be found)

Ramble: (mono-tone) I ate a watermelon, and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick them up, they all began to shout…

Ramble & Boys: you (YOU'SE) ate my (ME) momma.

Prankster & Marbles: O.O

Prankster: (drops her pen and feels Ramble's forehead) Ramble are you ok? You love the watermelon song.

Ramble: I do, it's just. (sniff) my white color pencil is gone.

Marbles: O.o (picks up at least 23 whites) Ramble….how could be missing one?

Jack: How could there be 20 shades of white?

Ramble: oh well there's egg shell white, polar bear white, snow white, paper white, antique white, white white …

Marbles: NO! I will buy you the one you're missing if you stop talking about colors NOW!

Ramble: really?

Marbles: Yes.

Ramble: (throws arms around Marbles) Thank you! You're the best sister ever!

Marbles: Ack!

Prankster: sure let's all forget about Prankster, she's just the one that saves your ass when you piss Marbles off, and bought your art supplies and…

Riot: 'cuse me.

Prankster: What?

Riot: I think the people are here to see Crutchy, not you three…bond.

Prankster: there are a few that are still here to see Spot.

(Spot fans scream, rapid fan girls restrain them)

Ramble: I don't know what they see in him, I mean, look at him….he hasn't taken a shower the entire time he's been here and he's fricking snoring!

(Spot is fast asleep, mouth open and snoring)

Mush: Dat's getting' annoyin' can't we jist plug 'is nose?

Race: nah! Then he'd start snorin' through 'is mouth.

Mush: could we plug 'is mouth too?

Ramble: No sweetie, that's what they call murder.

Prankster: Ok! Bring out Crutchy.

(Crutchy is rolled out with much more rope then all the other boys had to.)

Marbles: Why so much rope Dreamy?

Dreamy: This kid's so frikin skinny he slid through the ropes 'bout 4 times before we got more rope.

Frecks: Yeah, it's a good thing Capy can run as fast as she does or else we wouldn't have a show.

Prankster: Thanks guys, I think Butterfly has some food for you.

Hotshot: sweet! (the newsie nappers leave, Crutchy is left with a scared look on his face, the hosts smile)

Ramble: Hi Crutchy! (waves)

Crutchy: H-hi.

Prankster: Here's the deal, you answer our questions, we let you go. (mutters) eventually, (normal) now let's go. Our first question comes from Gears, "why is it your leg is bum when you walk but when you dance its just fine?"

Crutchy: Camera angles.

Ramble: What?

Prankster: This is from Quipster, "what did you do the sauerkraut?"

Crutchy: (proud) Well, I put some dirt in it.

Prankster: (scoffs) weak! I would expect more from Ramble.

Ramble: yeah…HEY!

Crutchy: Was da dirt from 'er head?

Marbles: gross!

(Hosts scoot away from Crutchy)

Prankster: Ok this is from Twig. (reads question) HAHAHAHA! I LOVE THIS GIRL HAHAHAHAHA (collapse's on floor laughing)

Ramble: (takes cards) I'll read it, hehehe, ok Twig wants to know, "Do you think, if you wished real hard (and flapped those dumbo ears of yours), you could fly?"

Crutchy: O.O my ears ain't big! Right guys?

Racetrack: (looks away) yeah Crutchy, whatever ya say.

Crutchy: (fumes) I see how it is…..is dat Spot?

Jack: Yeah, an old vetern, he's survived everythin' they've thrown at 'im.

Prankster: Excuse me, this isn't happy hour. Pay attention.

Ramble: Ok, the next question is from Aura, "Are you afraid of Spot? If so why?"

Crutchy: Well, up until 3 seconds ago, yeah, it's hard to be afraid of a guy who drools in 'is sleep.

Marbles: Whoa, did Crutchy make a crack at Spot?…I'm almost feeling sorry for the sucker.

Prankster, Ramble & everyone else: O.O

Marbles: What? I said almost!

Ramble: sure. (softly sings) Marbles and Spot, sitting in a tree F-U-C-

Prankster: RAMBLE! You know that Spot is impotent. 

Ramble: Hello, viagra!

Marbles: will you discuss the probability of Spot and me having sex some other time.

Ramble: yeah but-

Marbles: Read the questions!

Ramble: oh right, ok again Aura, "Did you know that aside from... Les.... you have like the smallest fanbase, including AND limited to.... Me (Aura), Cliff, and Gears?"

Crutchy: I have fans?

Prankster: weird isn't it?

Crutchy: yeah.

Ramble: Ok, from Dragonfly, "Why are you nice to Weasel?"

Crutchy: 'cause ya gotta be polite to people.

(Everyone looks at Prankster)

Prankster: What? Why are all y'all looking at me?

Ramble: Again, Dragonfly, "Why don't you bonk the Delancey's over the head with you crutch?"

Crutchy: hey good idea, I'll 'member dat next time.

Marbles: (sighs) Ramble, I'll read the questions. (takes cards)

Ramble: Ok, oh Prankster, I wanna go to the zoo.

Prankster: What? Now?

Ramble: Of course not now, just sometime this week.

Prankster: Ok queen of randomness, I'll make sure to pencil you in.

Ramble: Ok (colors)

Marbles: If you two are done, I'd like to start the questions. Ok, this is from Rhapsody, "Where did you learn to dance so well?"

Crutchy: It's a musical, we all dance good.

Prankster: (concentrating on her notes, doesn't look up) 'cept Spot.

Marbles: Yeah, well that's a given. Ok this is from Sparks, "Where do you sell and with whom?"

Crutchy: Well, I like ta stay in crowded areas, let me customer's come to me, an' I (sniff) sell by meself? 

Ramble: why?

Crutchy: No one wants ta sell with me. 

Ramble: Oh no! (looks at boys, they desperately try to roll away) You're all mean.

Mush: whoa, we never said we ain't gunna sell with 'im. 

Marbles: (ignores the impending deaths of most of the newsies.) Again Sparks, "Is there something going on between you and Race, 'cause I've heard rumors?"

Race & Crutchy: O.O NO!

Race: How come EVER episode somebody's sexual orientation gets questioned?

Prankster: I believe we're asking the questions here.

Marbles: Ok this comes from Keza: Queen Of Procrastination, "what would you do for a klondike bar?"

Crutchy: What's a Klondike Bar?

Prankster: You know what I'd do?

Ramble: No, what?

Prankster: I'd go to the store and buy one.

Ramble: Or you could see if Butterfly brought some.

Prankster: HEY BUTTERFLY!!! (Butterfly comes in) Do we have any Klondike Bars?

Butterfly: O.o….ummm no, but we do have cheetos!

Prankster: ooooooh! Can have that?

Butterfly: sure. (reaches behind her and tosses Prankster a bag, then leaves)

(Prankster starts munching)

Marbles: Ok the next questions come from…(looks at all the questions) CARDS!

Cards: (Walks down) yeah.

Marbles: You read your questions to Crutchy.

Prankster: (swallows cheetos) I'll take over your job. (stands up and points to audience) HEY YOU! Yeah, You with the "Spot's hot" shirt, put that burning picture of me away, you practice voodoo on your own time…..

  
Everyone on stage: O.O

Marbles: You better hurry Cards, before every Spot fan is kicked out.

Cards: good idea, ok Crutchy (smiles evilly) "Have you ever wanted to punch David?"

Crutchy: Hasn't everyone?

Cards: "Why do you have such an annoying laugh?" 

Crutchy: To drive people like you away.

Riot: ohhh burn.

Cards: shut up Riot!

Riot: hey!

Ramble: READ THE QUESTIONS!

Cards: "What is with the hair?"

Crutchy: It's 1899, what're expectin'?

Cards: "Did you know that you walk funny?"

Crutchy: Yeah sure, let's all make fun of the gimp, cause it ain't like he got feelin's.

Cards: "Have you ever thought about a career as a clown?"

Crutchy: Only if you'd be the breaded-lady.

Spot: (has finally woke up) Well, look at this, the gimp's gotta spine.

Crutchy & Cards: SHUT UP SPOT!

Cards: "Do you find Denton attractive?"

Crutchy: umm No.

Cards: "Do you think Dutchy and Specs should get it on?"

Crutchy: oh yeah, those two were made for each other.

Cards: I know aren't they?

Splah: (from her light booth) HEY! LUCY, ETHEL! GOSSIP ON YOUR OWN TIME!

Crutchy: what?

Cards: don't bother. "If you had to be lovers with one newsie which one would you choose?"

Crutchy: Ummm…Jake, 'cause he don't talk much and would never say we did that.

Ramble: You know Jake's a mute right?

Crutchy: A WHAT? How could he be in a musical?

Ramble: beats me.

Cards: ok, I'm done. PRANKSTER GET BACK DOWN HERE I WANT MY JOB BACK!!!

Prankster: Ok, ok, ok (comes back down) 

Ramble: alright this is from Galaxy, she wants to know, "What do you think of David's leadership?"

Crutchy: (shudders) it's horrible, ya gotta let Jack outta here!

Prankster: sorry, s'not gunna happen.

Ramble: this is from Glimmer, "Did anyone ever tell you that when you thrust you look like a piece of cardboard being bent backwards? POING!!!"

Crutchy: is she callin' me fat?

Prankster: no I don't think so.

Crutchy: I KNEW IT! I'M FAT. (sobs)

Spot: And there goes that spine.

Marbles: I'd yell at you, if you weren't 100% correct

Jack: hey! Lovebirds! Flirt after the show. 

Spot & Marbles: BAH!

Prankster: (pats Crutchy's shoulder) there there, there there, there there.

Ramble: Ok this is from Lisa, "Do you have a girlfriend? Are you interested in having one?"

Prankster: see, there's SOMEONE who likes ya, and I bet she doesn't think you're fat.

(Crutchy still sobs)

Spot: (looks painful to say this) well, Crutchy, umm…(looks at ground) dojhwoenoiw.

Crutchy: What?

Spot: idon'tthinkyou'refat.

Prankster: what?

Spot: I DON'T THINK YOU'RE FAT! GOT IT! 

Prankster: (looks at Ramble) You thinking what I'm thinking?

Ramble: yeah

Prankster & Ramble: (sings) I've got a crush on you, sweetie-pie, all the day and night time, hear me sigh, it's not another flirtation, we're provin' that there's pre-destination. Could you coo? Could you care? For a country cottage, we would share? The world will pardon my mush, (looks at Mush muhahaha) 'cause I've got a crush my baby on you!

Marbles: ladies and gentlemen…my sisters.

Prankster and Ramble: THANK YOU!

Marbles: Ok this is from Brains, "Does it ever annoy you that everyone is so patronizing to you all the time?"

Crutchy: yeah, but I gotta feelin' I'm gunna get used to it.

Prankster: alright, that's all for now.

Marbles: So we learned that Crutchy actually has a spine…and thinks he's fat. 

Ramble: HEY LOOK! (holds up colored pencil) Here's the pencil I was missing! I wonder where it went.

Marbles: (monotone) wait here while I alert unsolved mystery's. 

Prankster: (ignores her sisters) Ok, send in your questions for Itey. If you don't know who he is. He's the one that shares a bed with Snitch and gets Snitch's foot in his face. So send your questions to him. Bye.

Ramble: (much more happier) I ate a watermelon, and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick them up, they all began to shout.

Ramble & boys: YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

Crutchy: What a great song.

Ramble: I know!

Marbles: bye guys. (stands up)

Prankster: I don't know about you guys, but I could go for a Klondike bar, Ramble can I borrow some money.

Ramble: What am I gunna get?

Prankster: how 'bout you give me some money and I won't tell Marbles that it was you that killed her goldfish "Goldy"

Ramble: Prank, we were in the second grade, I doubt she even rememb-

Marbles: Ramble did WHAT!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Prankster & Ramble: O.O ack!

**************************** ***************************


	11. Itey I had no Ideer!

Hi everyone, Here's chapter 11. With Itey.

Thank you: to all who reviewed and asked questions…you guys rock.

Disclaimer: If it looks to cleaver to be mine. It probably isn't. Prankster, Ramble and Marbles belong to me. Everyone else either belongs to themselves or belongs to the Disney co. 

******************* *********************

Episode 11: Itey…I had no Ideer.

(Drum Roll) Riot: That's right boys and girls it's once again time for the well reviewed show… "The Left Shoe Show." (audience applause)

(The hosts are at their desks. Jack, Race, Mush, & Spot are sitting tied to their chairs. Crutchy is sitting next to Butterfly eating jelly doughnuts. Specs is STILL watching shark week. Boots is no where to be found)

Ramble: (sings) I ate a watermelon, and all the seeds fell out and when I went to pick them up they all began to shout,

Ramble & Boys: YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

Prankster: Hello everyone. Today, we have everyone's silent newsie.

Marbles: Well except for Jake.

Prankster: Well of course…the mostly silent newsie Itey.

Racetrack: YOU'RE GUNNA TORTURE ITEY?!?!?!

Marbles: Only if he's being difficult.

Racetrack: But they can't torture Itey, he's too nice.

Ramble: Why Race? Is he your boyfriend?

Racetrack: Let's see…two minutes into the show, me sexual orintation is questioned, now it's da Left Shoe Show, now it can begin.

(Girls shake their heads)

Ramble: You're weird.

Marbles: (ignoring Ramble) Spot's been a little quiet lately.

(Spot glares)

Prankster: Yeah, I'd be a little pissed off if I was given a make over and then some girl stole my diary.

Spot: It's not a diary…it's a journal.

(boys struggle not to laugh)

Prankster: It's filled with your love poems about Marbles…Spot it's a diary.

Spot: YOU READ IT?!?!?! O.O!!!!

Prankster: Ummmm no…I was just teasing….wait a minute….LOVE POEMS TO MARBLES! O.O!!!!!!

(Prankster & Marbles dive for the diary. Prankster gets it first and starts flipping through the pages)

Prankster: Ha! I like this one. Marbles how much I love thee….Let me count the ways…one-one-thousand. Two-one-thousand. Three-one-thousand. (sighs) that's it, no more, "who framed Rodger Rabbit for you."

Marbles: You're both joking, I don't believe ya.

Prankster: as you should! (shows the diary, flipping the pages…it is completely blank)

Ramble: Yeah people, Spot? Fall in love with Marbles? We like our "fan" mail, we don't want any flames any time soon.

Prankster: Yeah, there is no way I could make that happen.

Ramble: Prank…you're the author.

Prankster: yeah, but there will be no romance here. Just good old fashion newsie torturing!

Mush: here here! 

Prankster: Anyway, let's get Itey out here.

(Itey is rolled on. He has a VERY confused look)

Prankster: Hi Itey.

Itey: (sees his friends and whispers) What do I do?

Jack: (shakes his head) Just answer their questions, it'll all be over soon.

Itey: (nods his head) oh, (to Prankster) hello what-ever-your-name-is.

Prankster: Hi! I'm Prankster, this is Marbles.

Marbles: Hola

Prankster: and the girl with the 128 deluxe-set of Crayola crayons is Ramble.

Ramble: Yo.

Prankster: all right, the first question comes from Firecracker, "why is Snitch in that awkward position on top of him? it looks like he just threw himself on there at some point in the night!"

Itey: What? Oh, well Snitch and I wouldn't have had to share a bed is Crutchy didn't break his and Snitch was being nice and let Crutchy have his bed.

Ramble: How did Crutchy break his bed?

Itey: have you seen da guy? 'e's huge.

Ramble: O.O OH NO!!!!!

Crutchy: (from offstage, you can hear the voice crack of a sobbing Crutchy) IT'S TRUE I'M FAT! (Butterfly is trying to console him.)  


Prankster: (sighs) MONDAY! (Monday walks on stage) Look, I know we agreed that you'd be our mascot, but I think you could help out the most if you were the on stage therapist. 

(Crutchy loudly sobs)

Monday: yeah that'd probably be best. (Monday leaves)

Prankster: ok Itey, this is from Falco Colon she asks, "If you could ever see them selves in the musical "chicago" which part would you want?"

Itey: O.o what?

Ramble: I think he'd be the guy that kills the person for popping bubble gum. Only it'd be having people stick their foot in his face.

Marbles: Yeah probably.

Itey: Why are ya talkin' like I ain't here?

Spot: (ignoring Itey) Hey Race these chairs have wheels, lets make a break for it. (starts to roll away)

(Hotshot pushes him back)

Spot: HEY, HOW COME BOOTS AIN'T TIED UP!?!?!?!?!

Itey: Boots is here?

Prankster: Well Spot, the reason Boots isn't tied down, it's because we like him more then you.

Ramble: I'll read, (takes cards) ok this is from Kaylee, "If you were a flavor of ice cream, what flavor would you be?"

Itey: Vanilla

Mush: (mumbles) boring.

Itey: What was that?

Mush: nothing

Ramble: ok again Kaylee, "Do you consider David an idiotic-supersonic-brain infection-disconnection-overweighted-constipated-dingdong-double headed-dork??"

Itey: oh my, it's horrible, David's turned into a…a…a…

Prankster: Hitler?

Itey: Yeah Hitler….wait….who's Hitler?

Prankster: Forget it.

Ramble: ok Kaylee asks, "Do you enjoy eating potatoes?"

Itey: Yes.

Ramble: Kalyee, "What's with you and your suspenders? You're always kissing them and licking them and such."

Itey: Hey! Dere my suspenders an' I'll kiss 'em if I want!

Marbles: oooo I think that was a little attitude.

Prankster: (smiles) I think you're right Marbles.

Prankster & Marbles: GLITTER! LISA!

(Glitter & Lisa come out)

Marbles: Itey has earned himself a makeover after the show.

Itey: (whispers to his friends) is that bad?

Jack: Only if you think Race and Spot look bad.

Itey: O.O (upon seeing Race in parachute pants) help!

Ramble: this question is from Kaylee too, "Do the other newsies miss the ones still here?"

Itey: Of course. Our leader was missin' some say he left for Santa Fe. But Spces, Mush, Boots, Crutchy, Race and Spot were missin' too. So we decided that the plague got 'em. 

Prankster: O.o…the plague?

Itey: yeah.

Marbles: I'm reading now. (snatches questions from Ramble. See who it is) Actually Riot, our announcer can read them since they're from her.

Riot: (from her booth) hi.

Itey: (jumps) is that god?

Riot: ummmm no? Anyway, first question, "Did you know Ramble has a crush on you?"

Ramble: What?

Mush: What?

Itey: What?

Ramble: You tell 'em it's not true!

Riot: (monotone) it's not true.

Prankster: is that true?

Riot: No it's not true.

Marbles: ah-ha a double negative!

Ramble: a double negative? You're telling me you have evidence?!?

Prankster: That sounds like a confession to me. (really fast) In fact the double negative has lead to proof positive, I'm afraid you gave yourself away.

Ramble: You've been watching clue again haven't you?

Prankster: yep.

Itey: (impatient) SO DOES OR DOESN'T RAMBLE HAVE A CRUSH ON ME?

Everyone: NO!

Itey: No she does, or no, she doesn't?

Ramble: DON'T!

Riot: CAN I ASK THE QUESTIONS NOW?

Prankster: YES!

Riot: "Why "Itey"? why not anything normal?"  
  
Itey: Well, I was really little when I was a kid. So they called me Itey-Bity. But, it jist got shorten' to Itey.

Riot: "Are the stories about you and Spot true?"

Itey: What? What stories? We 'ave stories? That's news ta me?

Riot: "Do you think your going to get out of here when the questions are done?"  
  
Prankster: yeah right.

Riot: ok I'm done.

Marbles: alright, this is from Crunch, "Boxers or briefs?"

Itey: Neither…

Ramble: so you wear nothing?

Itey: yeah

Prankster: kinky!

Marbles: (ignoring Prankster) ok this is from Galaxy, she asks, "If Specs and Duchty got together how would you feel about it?"

Itey: (shrugs) hmm whatever. Ain't I'm gunna be da moron dat tries ta stop 'em.

Marbles: again Galaxy, "What's your favorite food to get at Tibbys?"

Itey: hmmmm salad….with lots of salt.

(newsboys shake their heads when the word 'salt' is said)

Prankster: SALAD?!?!?! LIFE'S TOO SHORT TO LIVE ON RABBIT FOOD!

Ramble: (ignoring Prankster, to the newsboys) wait! Why salt?

Jack: don'tcha know? Itey's got a ting for salt.

Mush: yeah, it ain't a meal unless Itey dumps salt in everyting he eats.

Race: kindof entertaining actually.

Marbles: like you in parachute pants?

Race: Hey! You leave parachute pants out of this!

Ramble: (takes the questions and ignores the impending doom or Racetrack) ok this is from Checli she asks, "Anyone ever tell you you have just about the cutest smile in the free world? Just thought you should know--And Crutchy! I don't think you're fat at all! You're skinny as all get out--And hell, I wouldn't kick ya outta bed."

Itey: (smiles) actually no, I got a cute smile? (to Spot) ha! Someone like me smile more den you! Ha!

Spot: (evil death glare) hey watch it dimple-boy, one day we ain't gunna be tied up no more, an' dere's lots of dark alleyways in New York.

(Itey looks down sadly)

Ramble: (to comfort Itey) Oh Itey, don't be sad, Spot's just anger because he can't get up.

Itey: yeah he's tied down.

Marbles: No we mean he can't GET up.

Itey: O.o are you two alright?

Prankster: No we mean, he can't have sex!

Spot: Sure tell the world why don't you?

Ramble: O.O good idea! I'll go see Pulitzer! (starts to get up.)

Marbles: Sit down and read the questions!

Ramble: ok, this is from Dodger, "why there are no girls at the lodging house?"

Itey: Well, if we don't count Davy I guess because we don't 'ave room for 'em. I tink dere some goil lodging houses down da street though.

Race: Whoa! When has dere been a goils lodging house.

Itey: Since 'bout two weeks aftah you was abducted. 

Race: Figures.

Prankster: That was our last question. So Itey's secret….he likes salt and lots of it.

Itey: does this mean I get to go home?

Marbles: ha! Maybe after your makeover.

Prankster: No send your questions in to Dutchy. We'll see his view of him and Specs. Muhahaha! 

Ramble: I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick 'em up, they all began to shout. 

Ramble & boys: (shouts) YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

Itey: That's a good song.

Ramble: I know, but flatter me all you want you're still getting a makeover.

(Itey gets wheeled by Lisa into the abyss of the make-up room)

************** ***************

Ok send your questions to Dutchy. Thanks for reading. Oh btw. The title of the chapter is from a stupid joke I heard.

Q: What do you call deer with no eyes?

A: I have no Ideer.

Since Itey loves his salt, and so do deer, that joke came to me. So again, thanks for reading, bye.


	12. So Did Dutchy Spell It Right?

Thank god! I'm back! This had been a no-homework day for me. A first in a long time. My weekends were busier than the weeks. Anyway. Summer will start for me the 2nd week of June. So yaye!

Thanks: to everyone who reviewed, I loves you all.

Disclaimer: Do I look like Disney? Ummm no! Don't own the boys, never will. Marbles, Ramble and Prankster do belong to me. MUHAHAHA

********************* *****************************

(a peak in the backstage area, Splash, the light board operator and Aura, sound girl A.K.A. noise girl, are both on headset with their cues)

Splash: (to mystery person on the other side of her headset) yeah…the lights are ready….standing by.

Aura: (to her mystery person) yep, sound cues are in. the booth people are ready.

(Inside the therapists room, Monday is with her patient Race.) 

Monday: So you're not getting out of those parachute pants.

Race: nah! I like 'em.

(Monday sighs)

(by the food table, Butterfly is arranging the donuts in symmetrical order…then the newsie nappers, Hotshot, Frecks, and Dreamy, with a bound Dutchy come and start eating)

(The Camera people, Moods, Rhapsody, and Falco, and Aki, the cue card holder are standing around talking. Shortie, a rapid fan girl restrainer walks up)

Shortie: have you guys seen Prankster?

(The camera people shake their heads no)

Aki: why is she missing?

Shortie: the house opens in 15 minutes and people are going to sit down and OUR HOST ISN'T HERE YET!!!!!!!!

Moods: hold on, calm down. Prankster will be here.

Falco: Marbles and Ramble here?

Shortie: yeah, they were here hours ago. Ramble's coloring and Marbles is in the bathroom…I think.

(the Rapid fan girl restrainers, Cards, Sparks, and Capy are up in the empty audience seats, talking)

Capy: Cards, remember to get the drool buckets in the 'Spot' section, we don't want a repeat of the Boots episode.

Cards: (shutters) I say we have Specs come out and have Spot in the greenroom watching shark week.

Sparks: Yeah, but then our ratings would drop at least 75%

Cards: The sad and bitter truth.

(in the make up room, Lisa and Glitter are putting the finishing touches on Itey.)

Lisa: ok now repeat after me, I feel pretty

Itey: I feel pretty?

(Glitter holds up salt lick)

Itey: (sings) I feel pretty, I feel pretty, I feel pretty and witty and excessively happy. 

Glitter: I don't think that's the right lyrics

Itey: That's how Ramble sings it.

(Lisa and Glitter shrug)

(Outside, the sun is shining, the birds are singing and we are taken to a house. A lovely house, that has a bedroom, and a bed, with a lazy host inside the bed. Prankster wakes up and starts to stretch and looks at the clock which reads 8:37, Prankster does a double take)

Prankster: SHIT!

(back at the studio)

Aki: Moods? Did you hear something?

Moods: no.

(back at the house, Prankster rushes to find 'clean' clothes)

Prankster: (muttering over and over) I'm killing my sisters, I'm killing my sisters, I'm killing my sisters. (grabs purse and an orange and runs out the door, sees that her sisters took the car.) I'm REALLY gunna kill them. (starts to run at record breaking speed)  


(Back at the studio)

Riot: And now, it's time for…..The Left Shoe Show.

(Marbles and Ramble are the only ones there, along with the boys of course)

Ramble: I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick them up they all began to shout. 

Ramble & Boys: YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

Marbles: As you can see, Prankster is not with us at this time, though I'm sure she has a very go—(Prankster's screams are heard as she runs in at top speed and struggles to stop, taking deep breaths she sits down and nearly hyperventilates)

Prankster: I (breath) hate you (breath) guys, (breath) so (breath) much.

(Boots and Bookie walk in, Boots is carrying a bottle of water)

Boots: Butterfly (Jack winces) asked us to bring this to you.

(Prankster starts drinking the water)

Spot: HEY! WHY AIN'T HE TIED UP? (Race, Jack, & Mush agree)

Boots: don' ya know? All da other's ain't tied up. We 'ang out in the greenroom. We even convinced Specs to turn off shark week!

Race: Wait a minute! Yer tellin' me dat you, Specs, Itey, & Cruthy ain't gotta be tied up?!?!?

Bookie: To answer the question….yes. They cooperate, therefore they get benefits that more…difficult guest's don't.

Prankster: (coughs) excuse me, but we have a show tonight.

Bookie: Oh yes, quite, come Boots, we have to mail paychecks.

Prankster: Paychecks?

Ramble: Oh, didn't we tell you? We got spouncers.

Prankster:…..O.o….I'll ask later, so we have Dutchy today, and we will found out his relationship with Specs. 

Audience: ohhhhhh

Prankster: Alright lets bring out Dutchy.

(Newsie Nappers roll Dutchy out) 

Dutchy: oh hey guys. 

Ramble: Now Dutchy, you answer our questions like the good boy we all know you are, you won't end up like these boys here.

Dutchy:….ummm…ok.

Prankster: ok, now first question comes from Sparker, "ok, how about why doesn't he have ANY speaking lines in the movie? (or does he, and I didn't notice?) either way, he's too damn quiet! speak up, man!"

Dutchy: I did talk, I asked Kloppy if I spelled 'strike' right!

Ramble: (pats his head) and you did!

Dutchy: O.o

Prankster: This comes from asp, "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?"

Dutchy: (whispers to friends) I don't know what a 'tootsie pop' is what do I do?

Spot: Make up an answer!

Dutchy: ok, my answer is 27. (smiles)

Prankster: again, asp, "why don't any of you newsies revolt against Davey and get a different leader?"

Dutchy: (shudders) we ain't too organized, all da main peoples of da movie were taken' and figured for dead.

Race: Dere dey go wid da 'dead' thing, we ain't dead.

Spot: Though some of us wish we were.

Prankster: next question, is from Dodger, "What's with the name Dutchy? You don't look Dutch."

Dutchy: Well, Specs gave me that name….(is interrupted by the sound of "ahhhhhs" from the audience) and well, He jist started calling me that.

Marbles: Aren't pet names the greatest?

Ramble: Yes they are….pookie.

Marbles: :0 (holds up fist) call me Pookie again, I dare ya!

Prankster: Oh look ANOTHER question, again from Dodger, "Do you actually not know how to spell or were you faking it to make Kloppman feel useful?"

Dutchy: Well, actually, I can't write.

Ramble: Ahhh, that's ok, here, (hands him some crayons) color with me!

Dutchy: O.o (to boys) what do I do?

Mush: When Ramble says color, ya color!

Dutchy: ok, (tries his best color while tied up)

Prankster: and this is a comment from Dodger, "Oh ya, Race, keep the parachute pants, you look cute in them. and Spot, keep spirits up."

Race: See! Me public likes da Parachute pants.

Jack: Your public? They're only 'ere 'cause Spot's 'ere. 

Ramble: Actually Jack, Racetrack does have a pretty big fan base along with you, Mush and the occasional Blinkers.

Mush: Blinkers?

Ramble: Oh that's my new name for Kid Blink!

Prankster: Next question! Is from Jinx, Jinx asks, "how come it's taken so long for him to realize that he loves Specs...I mean, come on. I barely knew their names the first time I'd seen the movie, and I knew it!"

Dutchy: Wait….what? I'm in love with Specs? Since when? What? How?

Race: (mutters) They'd make a bettah couple den Jack an' Sarah!

Prankster, Marbles & Ramble: ohhhhhhhh

Ramble: Burn!!!!

Jack: What? YOU don't like Sarah either.

Race: O.o. She's Davey's sistah, how good could she possibly be?

Ramble: "Sistah! So you have a twin sistah! Your thoughts betray her as well." Quick what movie?

Marbles: Star Wars, Return of the Jedi, too easy. Do another.

Prankster: How 'bout you read the questions?

Marbles: Alright, fine, drink your Figi water!

Prankster: since when can we afford Figi?

Ramble: Since we got over 150 reviews with no flames.

Marbles: This question comes from Sapphire O'Riley, to everyone, "Do your lovely hosts let you use the rest room?" 

Spot: of course, we get one 10-minute break every 4 hours. 

Marbles: this is from Chelci, she asks, "So, are you cheap, like they say of all Dutch people? I'm dutch too...and hey! I ain't cheap...I jsut wanted to know...if you had a lot of money, would you hoard it, or would you spend spend spend?"

Dutchy: umm, I'd save it, because ya nevah know when you'd get money again.

Ramble: I'll read, Ok this is from Aki, She asks, "If you could say one thing to Specs right now, what would it be?"

Dutchy:….yer alive?

Prankster: Oh unromantic!

Ramble: Well, we have had Specs locked up for a few months now.

Dutchy: Specs? Locked up? What?

Ramble: Oh no, not like these boys, (points to the boys in front) Specs has been in the greenroom, watching Shark Week.

Marbles: Ok these questions are from…..CARDS!!!!

Cards: (comes up) you called?

Marbles: job switch for a while, read your questions.

Cards: Gladly, (sits in Marbles chair, Marbles goes to be a fan girl restrainer) Now, my first question is, "Have you ever heard of the Band STYX?"

Dutchy: ummm no!

Cards: "What is the use of laser mice?"

Dutchy:…to make people…wonder?

Cards: "Do you want to jump Specs' bones and rip off his clothing??"

Dutchy: Bones?

Cards: "What is the slope of 4x-5y=1?"

Dutchy: y=4/5x+1

Jack: What?

Prankster: Correct!

Cards: "Do you think glasses are sexy?"

Dutchy: Well I wear 'em don't I?

Cards: "Should Jack get returned?"

Dutchy: yeah

Cards: "What is the bestest colour in the world?"

Dutchy: Blue

Cards: "Why do Humans get the right to be above other animals?"

Dutchy: 'cause were smartah!

Cards: "Why should/ Do we exist?"

Dutchy: Because we do.

Cards: "Why is Catlin so deep?"

Dutchy: Who's Catlin?

Cards: "Do you like Tommy Shaw?"

Dutchy: Who?

Cards: "Do you know Tommy Shaw's Birthday?"

Dutchy: What?

Cards: "Do you know who Tommy Shaw is?"

Dutchy: No!

Cards: "Do you think STYX is the bestest band in the world?"

Dutchy: What?

Cards: "Do you think gun Control is a good idea?"

Dutchy: Sure why not?

Cards: "You do know that you and Specs are perfect for each other right?"

Dutchy: What? Why am I getting asked that?

Race: Dutch, everyone's sexual orientation gets question on this show….you just more than others.   


Cards: Ok, I'm done.

Marbles: (comes in) ok, back to your post!

Cards: (salutes) you got it.

Prankster: Ok next question is from Riot, "Are you or have you ever been pregnant?"

Dutchy:….no!

Prankster: again Riot, "Are you in denial about specs?"

Dutchy: what's there to be in denial about?

Marbles: he is.

Ramble: Well, you know what I think? I think that Dutchy and Specs have been oppressed by a society that doesn't understand their love.

Prankster: Go on.

Ramble: So I suggest that we keep Dutchy so that he can finally express his feelings for Specs.

Dutchy: there are NO feelings!

Ramble: (shakes head) Dutchy, you're in love, you just don't know it yet!

Dutchy: (bitter) Well, it's a good thing I got you goils to think for me, how DID I think before you came along?

Ramble: Oh you don't have to thank us. (smiling, missing the sarcasm)

Prankster: Ok these questions are from Firecracker, "are you upset that you only got one line in the movie?"

Dutchy: Nah! 

Prankster: Again, Fire, "what is happening with David as leader? What do you think will happen?"

Dutchy: Well, he's as evil as Pulitzer right now! We're hoping he gets 'killed' soon.

Marbles: I'll read, this is from Sureshoot Higgins, "When you were passing out the newsies banner why did you go wit Blink and not Specs were youse two having a fight or sumting?"

Dutchy: Specs like to sell by himself, says he gets distracted when others sell wid 'im.

Ramble: (mutters) Others, or just you?

Dutchy: What was that?

Ramble: Nothing. (starts coloring and humming 'The Watermelon Song')

Marbles: Ok this is from Aguachica, she asks, "Do you bleach your hair?"

Dutchy: ummm no.

Marbles: again Aguachica, "Did you come from Holland? If so, why don't you have a Dutch accent?"

Dutchy: actually, me parents were Dutch, I was born in New York though.

Prankster: ok Dutchy, what's your deepest secret?

Dutchy: What?

Ramble: Yeah, what's your secret?

Dutchy: Well, I can't read….

Marbles: Wait, you can't read or write?

Dutchy: no.

Ramble: How're you a newsie?

Prankster: I think this is one of those "how is Jake a newsie? Moment"

Marbles: I agree.

Ramble: So is time up.

Prankster: Yes. Please send your questions for Snipeshooter. Get that. Snipes!

Ramble: yeah! (sings) I ate a watermelon, and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick 'em up, they all began to shout.

Ramble & Boys: YOU (YOU'SE)ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

Dutchy: Oh! That's a good song.

Ramble: I know!

Prankster: Ok, bye guys remember to Snipeshooter, (turns to her sisters) now that the show's done I can do this.

Marbles: Do what?

Prankster: kill you. HOW COULD YOU NOT WAKE ME UP?!?!?!

Ramble: look at the time gotta go!

(Marbles and Ramble Run, while Prankster chases after them)  
****************** *******************************

and it's done. Please review. Bye. 


	13. Stand By Your Snipeshooter

I know, I'm finally back. I won't waste time talking.

Thank you: to all who reviewers. 191! I'm hoping to break 200.

Disclaimer: I don't own newsies, only Disney does. So there ya go. I do own Prankster, Marbles and Ramble though. 

Lucky Episode 13: Stand by your Snipeshooter

************************************************* 

(Prankster, Marbles and Ramble are sitting at their desks. Spot, Jack, Mush, Race are still tied up. The others are no where to be found)

Prankster: Before we start this show, I have the pleasure of introducing the new House Band "The Headlines" So if you all could introduce yourselves.   


Punky: I'm Punky, on lead vocals.

Pinch: Pinch, on bass and back up guitar. 

Dutchy: Dutchy on drums.

Bolt: Bolt, on lead guitar.

Hades: I'm Hades on Triangle.

Dodge: and I'm Dodge, I'm the D.J./sound techie.

Marbles: Ladies and Gentlemen, The Headlines.

The Headlines and Ramble: I ate a watermelon, and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick 'em up they all began to shout.

The Headlines, Ramble, & boys: YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

Prankster: Very good, now let's roll Snipeshooter on out here.

(Hotshot rolls him out)

Snipes: O.O Cowboy?!?!?! YER ALIVE?!?!?!

Jack: Yeah.

Prankster: Ok Snipes here's the deal, you answer our questions and be a good little boy and we'll set you lose.

(Tied down newsies scoff)

Prankster: (flashes pinto melting look) Hey it's a party backstage. Dutchy & Boots have jobs here! (To Snipes) So you can be like him, (points to Spot) or him, (points to Dutchy, who happens to be twirling his drumsticks.) Understand?

Snipes: yes?

Ramble: Ok, I'll start, this question is from Sureshot Higgins, (everyone looks at Race)

Race: O.O What?

Ramble: (continuing) she wants to know, "What is your obsession with stealing Race's cigars?"

Snipes: He sleeps in da bunk next ta me, it's a convenience thing.

Ramble: Ok, this is from Klover, she wants to know, "what's with the name and if is cause of great aim why aren't you in Brooklyn?"

Snipes: Well, I used to live in Brooklyn, until….(looks at Spot)

Marbles: Until what?

Snipes: Until well, Spot got caught in a cross-fire and it hit him in the..well…you know.

(All tied down newsies, Dutchy included, cross their legs)

Marbles: Is that why Spot's impotent?….YOU made Spot impotent!

Mush: O.O….never heard THAT story!

Spot: That's a lie!

Prankster: Moving on! This question is from, Falco Colon, (one of our LOVELY camera persons) she wants to know, "If he had to trade places with one person ANYWHERE in the world in ANYTIME period..who would it be?"

Snipes: hmmm….good question….(thinks) I'm thinking, I'd be Tammy Wynette.

(Dutchy does cymbal crash)

Prankster: oh you're kidding, now really.

Snipes: I told you, Tammy Wynette.

Marbles: Tammy Wynette…the country star….stand by your man….country star?

Snipes: Yep.

Ramble: no Snipes, that's not sad at all, what's the next question?

Prankster: Oh it's from (reads it) ohhh (sighs) CARDSSSSSS!!!!! Come read your questions. (to the group) I'll be by the snack table if ya need me.

Bookie: (runs in) Prankster? You weren't planning on going to Butterfly for the snack table?

Prankster: Well yeah why?

Bookie: Well, she's cleaning out her locker and going away.

Prankster: Why?

Bookie: Dutchy bit her.

Prankster: He BIT her. (Looks at band)

Bolt: Don't look at us, we can't control 'im.

Prankster: (sighs) I'm gunna try and catch her. Cards! Read your questions. (runs backstage, behind the curtain you can hear Prankster yelling) Butterfly, Dutchy didn't mean it….he's only a musician! 

Cards: (comes in, picks up the questions) ok Snipes, first question…is from me…I wanna know, "What colour are Skittery's Long underwear?"

Ramble: (points) hey Marbles, Cards spelt color wrong!

Marbles: She not American stupid. 

Ramble: Well, why do non-American's add the 'u'?

Marbles: I don't know….to piss you off.

Ramble: Ohhh

Cards: Excuse me! Can I interview Snipes now?

Marbles: yes.

Ramble: Sorry.

Snipes: well…..they're pink…I think…I dunno, neva really looked before ya know what I'm sayin'?

Cards: yes, second, "How many fingers does teh average person have?"

Ramble: Hey! She spelled 'the' funny too, is that another Non-American spelling trick.

Marbles: No, I think that's a typo.

Ramble: ohhhh

Cards: DO YOU MIND?!?!?!?

Ramble: Mind what?

Marbles: She wants you do be quiet.

Ramble: Ohhh….well why didn't she just say that?

Cards: :0

Marbles: Way ahead of you Cards, (to Ramble) Ramble, Spots ears need flicking.

Ramble: ok. (flick) (flick) (flick)

Spot: Why is it that whenever Ramble's being stupid, me ears get flicked.

Race: Probably has to do with the reason our sexual orientations our questioned every episode.

Snipes: The average person has 8 fingers. 'Cause two of 'em are thumbs.

Cards: "Will you steal Ramble's Crayons and eat the Tickle me Pink?"

Snipes: My arms are tied, an' I don't wanna eat crayon.

Marbles: Yeah, Ramble did that when we were seven….(shakes head) not a good experience.

Cards: "Would you eat a goat?"  
  
Ramble: Would you, could you on a boat.

Everyone: O.O

Ramble: What? Am I the ONLY person who read Dr. Seuss?

Snipes: I guess I would, I mean, it's meat right?

Cards: "Should Dutchy get a rasberry flavored condom?"

Snipes: What?

Marbles: Hey! This show is PG-13. Let's make sure to keep it that way.

Snipes: I don't understand.

Ramble: ya don't want to. 

Cards: "Should Specs collect pennies?"

Snipes: sure?

Cards: "Should Crutchy be made a eunich and thus prohibited from reproducing?"

Snipes: What's an eunich?

Ramble: I don't know. (looks at Marbles)

Marbles: Well, first off, it's spelled wrong, its Eunuch. And second, it's a castrated man.   


Snipes: ohhhh, ok, yes.

Cards: "Should David be "dropped" into the river?"

Snipes: most definitely.

Cards: "Would you get your belly button pierced?"

Snipes: no

Cards: "Will you launch yourself off the Eiffel tower and bounce?"

Snipes: I don't think so.

Cards: "Are you planning on a hostile take over of Havana?"

Snipes: no

Cards: "did you know you have an ugly mug?"

Snipes: O.O what?

Marbles: ok that's enough.

Cards: But I'm not done. 

Marbles: Oh yes you are.

Cards: but you insult the guests all the time.

Ramble: There's a difference between guests and Spot.

Prankster: (walking in) What'd I miss?

Marbles: Everything.

Prankster: ok. (to Cards) Back at your post.

Cards: ok. (leaves)

Prankster: ok this is from Galaxy, she wants to know, "Are you and Mush related?"

Snipes: not that I know of.

Prankster: again Galaxy, "Why are you a newsie?"

Snipes: 'Cause I got nothing else to do. 

Prankster: Galaxy, "Why did Oscar throw you on the ground it's not like you did anything to him?"

Snipes: Actually, we've had a rivalry for the longest time.

Ramble: why?

Snipes: (shrugs) I don't know. 

Prankster: Again Galaxy, "Which do you like better Key lime pie or Cheesecake?"

Snipes: Cheesecake

Prankster: Galaxy, "Do you like Starbucks or Caraboo?"

Snipes: What's Starbucks?

Marbles: an evil corporation.

Snipes: oh.

Prankster: Galaxy, "Are you friends with Les?"

Snipes: Yeah, he's nice.

Prankster: last one from Galaxy, "Do you like David as a leader?"

Snipes: NO!

Marbles: I'll read, ok these questions are from Googoodoll, "Do you know that smoking can cause lung cancer and heart disease and most young children die from second hand smoke?"

Snipes: yes?

Marbles: "Have you ever graduated from D.A.R.E (hint, hint)?"

Snipes: What?

Prankster: ya wouldn't get it.

Marbles: "What is so exciting about a crooked politician anyway?"

Snipes: They sell.

Ramble: I wanna read, this is from Seraph, "How old is he?"

Snipes: 14.

Ramble: "When did he get hooked on cigars?"

Snipes: When Kid Blink gave me one.

Prankster: I should've known that whore!

Marbles: PRANKSTER!

Prankster: sorry it's true. 

Ramble: ok this is from Spikes, "ok what's it like to be one of the younger newsies?"

Snipes: (shrugs) it's adequate. 

Ramble: this is from Pinch, "will you marry me- our kids can grow up to be midgets in the circus"

Snipes: ummmm no

Ramble: "Do Snitch's feet stink.. because I saw him wash them and they never got any cleaner"

Snipes: I never looked. 

Ramble: Again Pinch, "How tall are you?"

Snipes: 4"8'

Ramble: "What is holding Dutchy back from his love for Specs?"

Snipes: Probably his fear of rejection. 

Prankster: yes that's always hard.

Dutchy: (from his drumset) Excuse me, still in the room.

Marbles: Yes, Dutchy we can see you.

Snipes: it could be he's not Gay.

Marbles: no that can't be it.

Ramble: Ok last one from Pinch, "Are you related to the Delancys?"

Snipes: No, we're not.

Prankster: Ok these are from Kaylee, "why is your voice so low, yet you're a shrimp?"

Ramble: He's not a shrimp…he's a King Prawn!

Marbles: no more Muppets for you.

Prankster: "do you have a crush on boots, cuz you're always going out of your way to be near him?"

Snipes: no.

Prankster: "did you know that you have the least fans of all the newsies in new yawk?"

Snipes: I may not 'ave fans, but at least I can git up. (everyone looks at Spot)

Spot: yeah, let's all make fun of me. Next yer gunna make fun of my cane. Aren't ya?

Prankster: "did you ever get the urge to shave medda's head?"

Snipes: no, I haven't.

Prankster: "did you ever get the urge to grab les's wooden sword and slap him across the face with it?"

Snipes: Yes. 

Prankster: "does David irritate you?"

Snipes: yes.

Prankster: "do you plan to be a pirate when all grown up?"

Snipes: Actually, I wanna be a country star!

Marbles: a country star?

Snipes: Yep

Ramble: Explains the Tammy Wynette thing.

Prankster: Guess that's your secret, Ok this is from Void, "do you like badgers?"

Snipes: sure why not?

Prankster: Again void, "Do you think Dutchy's in denial?"

Snipes: Yeah.

Prankster: "What's the funniest thing in the world?"

Snipes: David thinking he can lead us.

Prankster: That is a funny thought. 

Ramble: What's the next question?

Prankster: There are no more. 

Ramble: That's it?

Prankster: that's it.

Marbles: Send your questions for Les.

Ramble: Can we sing?

Prankster: yep, remember Les will be on next.

Headlines & Ramble: I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick 'em up they all began to shout.

Ramble & Boys: YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

Snipes: Hey that song's cool. 

Ramble: Isn't it?

************************* **************

Well that's it. Les is the next chapter. Oh just so you all know. There is nothing wrong with country music, so don't flame me calling me an insensitive bitch. (for one thing I already know I am, and second, I make fun of ALL music)

Thanks for reading. Bye. 


	14. Les & Eyeliner

Hey all, I know, this is the longest I've gone without an update, I'm sorry. I was gone for most of the summer and then school started and yeah…life happened. But I'm back now.

Disclaimer: All newsies are property of the Disney Company. Prankster, Ramble, and Marbles belong to me. Any others belong to themselves. I am not making a cent off this story, and this is just for fun.

Thank you to all my readers/reviewers/supporters. You make this story.

And now, not without further ado here his the 14th episode with Les

Episode 14: Les & Eye Liner

************** ************

Riot: After a few month break, it's now time for the 14th episode of 'The Left Shoe Show'!

Ramble & Headlines: (sings) I ate a watermelon….and all the seeds fell out and when I went to pick 'em up, they all began go shout.

Ramble, Boys & Headlines: (Shot) YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA! 

Prankster: Sorry for the delay in episode, our author went on strike.

Marbles: yeah, the hussy! (we see her wearing a shirt that says "my-creator-went-to-Europe-and-all-I-got-was-this-stupid-t shirt.")

Ramble: Calm down it wasn't that bad. 

Prankster: Anyway! She's back now, so we can now do the episode. Today is a good day, we have Les, and I have a feeling there's going to be a lot of Davey bashing. But not anymore then our Spot bashing.

Spot: hey!

Marbles: Ah cram it, you know it's true!

Spot: Did you jist tell me ta cram it?

Marbles: What are ya deaf too?

Spot: Why I outta….

Ramble: Here Spot, (places something in his tied up hand)

Spot: What's this?

Ramble: A stress ball, the crew pitched in to get you one.

Spot: ahhh, thanks guys, (squeezes stress ball)

Prankster: And without further ado…here's Les.

(Les fanbase applauds, as Les is wheeled out on stage.)

Prankster: Ok Les, I'm sure you're wondering where all your buddies have been.

(Les nods)

Ramble: Well they've been here, so now you know.

Prankster: We just want to ask you a few questions, and if you're reallllllllly good, we might give you a job.

Les: Would I be untied?

Prankster:…….(thinks) hmmmm…….yes. Alright! Lets start with the questions. This is from klover, "don't you get annoyed at David not letting you see anything fun at all like this fight and all that stuff?"

Les: I guess…but I am pretty young.

Ramble:….I guess.

Prankster: This is from Klover too, "how do you feel having your brother in charge?"

Les: I guess he's not THAT bad.

(Dutchy starts coughing uncontrollably from behind his drum set, fellow band mates rush to help the coughing Dutchy) 

Racetrack: What's wrong?

Dutchy: (between coughs) I like the kid…(cough) much more funnier then his (cough) brother.

Prankster: ok Les, I'll level with you, if ya don't want to be tied down after this episode, you're gunna have to do some David bashing….and a few Spot bashing if you wanna get on our good side.

Les: oooooohhhhh Ok.

(Spot starts squeezing stress-ball)….(A/N Wow that's an alliteration if I ever wrote one…back to the show) 

Prankster: Ok, this is from Galaxy, "Do you have a thing for Jack?"

Les: Well, I need an older brother figure that isn't horrible, you know David.

Ramble: (takes a crayon, writes on the paper, holding it up it shows a '5.2') I give it a 5.2 on David bashing.

Marbles: Really? I gave him a 7.1 (holds up her score) 

Ramble: you know what? You're right

Marbles: No you are.

Ramble: I change my vote

Marbles: Me too.

Prankster: O.o….. I am SO not related to you two right now, again this is from Galaxy, "How is Sarah dealing with Jacks disappearances?"

Les: Well, after the funeral she started going out with this guy, but that didn't work out, so she took her life savings and bought some stock in….'AT&T' We're afraid she threw her money away. ….

Spot: No more, I can't bare to hear anymore.

Les:…ok

Prankster: ok this is from Sureshot Higgins, (everyone looks at Racetrack)

Racetrack: NO RELATION!!! 

Ramble: (sings) Race and Sureshot, sitting in a tree, F-U-C-

Marbles: (interupts) RAMBLE!

Ramble: (points to Spot) He taught it to me.

Marbles: he's impotent….but just 'cause I need an excuse to hit him. (smacks Spot upside the head)

Spot: Ow! I hate you people! 

Prankster: Ok, as I said, from Sureshot, she wants to know, "Why don't you have a newsie nick?"

Les: 'cause I haven't been around long enough. 

Prankster: Ok this is from Rhapsody, she wants to know, "Does David abuse you when you're at home?"

Les: no

Prankster: Again, Rhapsody, "Would you like to tie Sarah's hair up in knots and chop it all off?"

Les: no

Prankster: Rhapsody, "How come you don't do any pelvic thrusts like the other boys?"

Les: I'm Near 10!

Ramble: Well, that's no good, if anyone asks, just say you're 7!

Jack: HEY! THAT'S ME LINE!!!!

Ramble: yes it was, It's my turn to read, (takes questions) ok, this is from Drama-Queen, "Who would you rather have as a brother, Racetrack, Mush or David?"

Les: Racetrack.

Racetrack: ahhh….

Marbles: Why? 

Les: So I can swipe his cigars…(looks at Racetrack, he's STILL wearing parachute pants) Actually, I'd like to change my answer…I want Mush.

Prankster: That's probably the best choice.

Mush: (smiles) Ha! I'd be the best older brother ever.

Marbles: yes, I'm sure you would.

Ramble: ok these questions are from…..CARDS!!!!

Cards: (enters) you called?

Ramble: You get to read your questions.

Prankster: I'm gunna watch Shark Week, don't worry Dutchy, I won't get too cuddly with Specs. 

Dutchy: (fumes)

Cards: (sits in Prankster's chair) ok this question is from….me, I wanna know, "what is your favourite colour?"

Ramble: ohh funky 'u's 

Les: Red

Cards: Why is it that David is the only newsie who doesn't have an accent even though he's lived in New York his whole life?

Les: He's trying to be all hoity-toity

Cards: What is the picture on a tootsie roll pop that gets you a free lollypop?  


Les: ummmm what's a tootsie roll pop?

Cards: What is an Emu?

Les: a small elephant?

Cards: Have you ever disobeyed your parents?

Les: I don't think so….

Cards: Is David a good leader?

Les:……no?

Marbles: correct!

Cards: Are you Jewish? 

Les: yes

Cards: Should Dutchy and Specs get together?

Les: It would be best for them.

Dutchy: Hey Spot! Can I have that stress ball?

Spot: Hell no! mine! (squeezes stress ball)

Dutchy: ohhhh sad!

Cards: Do you have a pencil handy?

Les: (looks at tied hands)…ummmm….no

Cards: What's the capital of North Dakota?   
  
Les:…..Bismark?

Ramble: Correct!

Cards: Should I actually get back to my job?

Les: please.

(Bookie the intern drags Prankster back in)

Prankster: Thank you Bookie, you (points to Cards) out of my chiar.

Cards: (Salutes) bye Les.

Prankster: (sits down) Ok new questions.

Ramble: This is from "Sita-Chan" "The sword, kid. Why?"

Les: I wanna be a pirate.

Marbles: A pirate?!? 

Prankster: Is that his big secret?

Les: I guess.

Ramble: Ok this is from Sita-Chan, "You know that you're so tiny and adorable that I could shove you in my purse and steal you away to Nigaragua where people don't object to other people doing that, right? And I WILL do it, if I ever get the chance."

Les: Was that a question?

Ramble: (shrugs) again Sita-Chan,) "What's wrong with your hot dog? It looks weird."

Les: it wasn't eaten.

Marbles: Gross.

Race: What, you one of them peoples that won't eat meat?

Marbles: no I'm one of those, 'I-need-to-know-what's-in-my-food-people'

Prankster: Amen!

Ramble: "Who do you hate more, your brother, or your sister?"

Les: ummm brother?

Ramble: "Do your parents ever get on your case for the newsies being a bad influence on you?"

Les: Not since the newsies' started to disappear. 

Ramble: ok these are from Kawaii Julie Sama, "Do you have any real friends outside of the newsies?"

Les: (hangs head) No

Ramble: "Does Davie have ANY friends?"

Prankster: He doesn't have any friends. Moving on. (grabs questions) Ok these are from, Seraph2, "Who do you like better, David or Jack?"

Les: Jack

Prankster: "Do you know how obnoxious you are?"

Les: …..no…

Prankster: Ok, these are from Legs, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Les: A Pirate.

Prankster: (sighs) "Racetrack was supposed to take care of you when David followed the carriage to rescue Jack. Is he a good babysitter?"

Les: Oh yeah, we played poker allll night. An' then he gave me some money and I had to go to Kid Blink and get some gold coins.

(EVERYONE looks at Race)

Race: What?

Ramble: You let a kid help you support your chocolate coin addiction? (hits him with Spot's stress ball)

Race: Ow!

Spot: (starts laughing uncontrollably) 

Prankster: "What is your favorite thing about going to Irving Hall? Is Medda as nice to you in real life as she was in the movie?"

Les: I like getting the candy, and she is very nice.

Prankster: Ok this is from Splash Fate, "Does your brother have a 'thing' with Denton?"

Les: I don't think so…maybe.

Jack: He doesn't have a 'thing' for me!

Prankster: Again Splash, "Who have you been hanging out with since Jack left and was assumed dead?"

Les: Well, I was hanging out with Boots, then he got kidnapped, and then Snipes, but he got kidnapped, so now it's just me.

Prankster: Last one from Splash, "You seem like the closest one to normal out of your family...were you adopted?"

Les: No I wasn't. 

Marbles: Ok these are from SapphireO'Riley, "Do you think Medda is hot? Do you know how old she is?"

Les: No

Marbles: "Are all the guys just a bunch of hormonal chumps?"

Les: I guess so.

Marbles: "Was David dropped on his head as a child?"

Les: Yeah he was, but don't tell him that.

Marbles: "Would you ever want to lead the newsies?"

Les: Not after seeing my brother's failed attempt.

Ramble: Ok these are from Sheridan Quest, "If you could have one superpower, what would it be, and why?"  


Les: I would want to fly, That way if my ship ever sinks I won't die.

Prankster: there we go on the pirate thing.

Ramble: "Have you ever tried to beat your brother senseless with that sword of yours?"

Les: no

Jack: can I?

Ramble: "Have you ever had to eat a newspaper?"

Les: No

Ramble: "Why do you have an accent, and your brother doesn't?"

Les: ummmm he was born on Vacation. 

Prankster: ohhh

Ramble: "Dogs or cats?"

Les: Dogs.

Ramble: Ok this are from Inquisitive, "Has David ever threatened you life? because he looked pretty mad when you yelled STRIKE!"

Les: No, he just didn't want to work at a strike.

Prankster: Ok these are from Bookie, our own loveable intern, "Why don't you go to school?"

Les: Because I have to work.

Prankster: "Can you get me a date with Racetrack?"

Les: Hang on, (leans in to see Race) Hey Race

Race: What?

Les: would you go on a date with Bookie

Race: (shrugs) yeah.

Marbles: No dating on the set.

Les: But for the record I did it.

Ramble: (pats his head) yes you did.

Prankster: Ok these are from Technicolor DreamGirl, "If Jack likes you so much, why did he take Boots and your brother to Brooklyn and not you?"

Les: (shrugs) it's a long walk to Brooklyn and Jack wanted Spot to scare David.

Spot: Jack, did ya really do that?

Jack: yeah.

Prankster: "How did you manage to fall asleep during a riot?"

Les: I was tired. 

Prankster: ok.

Ramble: What's the next question?

Prankster: There are none.

Marbles: So Les wants to be a pirate.

Ramble: Oh my goodness, I think we should make him look like Johnny Depp.

Prankster: Ramble, that has to be one of the smartest things to come out of your mouth. GLITTER, LISA.

(Glitter and Lisa come out) 

Prankster: Can we make Les look like a pirate.

Lisa: like Johnny Depp.

Prankster: Yep.

Glittler: ok, but we may have to buy some more eyeliner.

(they wheel Les out.)

Ramble: Who's next?

Prankster: David. MUHAHAHAHA!

Ramble: oh my goodness.

Marbles: he gunna get ripped, hahaha, well send in your questions.

Ramble, Band and Guys: (sings, & Plays) I ate a watermelon and all the seeds fell out, and when I went to pick them up they all began to shout. YOU (YOU'SE) ATE MY (ME) MOMMA!

Prankster: Bye

**************************** *********************

Ok, so there it was, If you have questions for David. Please review. Thanks, have a great day, and bye. 


End file.
